Where Did I Come From?

I had a conversation with Oscar walking home from school the other day. It wasn’t your typical conversation with a 7 year old. It was a conversation I wish the world could hear, because so many people don’t know it. But Oscar does, and so do his 4 and 5 year old brothers.

What is it? What do they know? Hang onto your hats, folks, because this may be news to some of you. They know that they created themselves.

And they know that their spirit self (AKA Higher Self or Inner Being) who gave them life is guiding them every second of every day, because they are one. They know that it was their intention to be here in this human life with these parents and these siblings. Women are inter-dimensional vessels of creation – but they don’t know the details yet 😉

They know it was their intention to create their physical bodies and they know they are still creating from within them. What they have yet to learn, and what most of us have yet to learn, is to create with intention; to create from centred energy rather than let the dense energy of fear and reaction have its way with us.

As their mother, it is my intention to remind them of these things often, and to hold the space for them to fully understand these truths. I will hold the space for them to know they can be, do, and have anything they desire, and that having a desire in and of itself means they have found a path worth taking.

Let me put this into practical terms. When teaching a child to ride a bike, you know without a doubt that they can do it. You know intuitively how much help to give. You know when to let go of the bike, and when to hold on tight. You know when to intervene, and you know when to let them try all by themselves. You know it’s a done deal. You can see it, and yet they whine, protest, and give up a few times. But your knowing will prevail, because the energy you hold is steady, strong, and high vibrational.

That’s exactly what our higher selves do for us. They give us support 24/7. They whisper in our ear. They tell us to turn right, to take this short cut, to go for a run, and to grab a drink of water. They love us unconditionally – with detached compassion, knowing that we’ll get the hang of this human thing eventually. And whether we do or don’t, they love us all the same. If you miss the boat this time, they’ll send another one. Or you’ll die missing all of the boats and come back to Earth to do it all again. “Let’s do it again. It’ll be fun” you’ll say. And you’ll do it again. And deep down you will remember. And this time, you’ll catch that boat. And all of it is really, really perfect.

You are perfect, right now, wherever you are. Whether you’re in the dark or full of light. Whether you’re angry, or sad, or happier than you’ve ever been in your life. It’s all perfect. You are exactly where you are meant to be, and you’re learning exactly what you need to learn.

We are all children in this school of life. We never get it done, and we never truly get it wrong because of it! We’re in a perpetual state of change. There are bumps and bruises, and celebrations of life and death. But most of all, there is love all around. God is in all things. There are unanswered prayers on the surface. Underneath the surface are prayers that have been answered in the most perfect of ways – in the most unimaginably perfect of ways. A miscarriage turns into the most perfect of pregnancies at a later date. A lost job turns into the job of your dreams. A failed relationship turns into you meeting the love of your life. Whatever happens, it’s all happening for you because you have the greatest of guides who knows your deepest desires – You.

My kids know that they create their own reality. They know that happiness is a choice. Well, they may not know it yet, but the seeds have been planted. They know that tantrums are a choice, too. And they know that mommy and daddy choose to have tantrums sometimes! And though life is not always perfect, it actually is. It’s perfect.

We’re all learning in this school of life, so let’s do it together. Hug it out often. Forgive daily. And know that whatever the question, LOVE is always, always the answer. Some things actually never do change – that’s how you know it’s the truth.

 

Alignment is Everything

Alignment is everything. It’s knowing when someone needs a hug and it’s knowing exactly what to say, even in the toughest of human moments. It’s having the best timing and the sly punch line. It’s pure heart wide-open perfection. It’s unconditional love and everlasting joy; pure magic in every waking moment.

How do you get there? One day, one moment, one thought, one nap, one meditation, one desire, one mistake, one laugh, one puppy; one step at a time.

How do I know when I’m there? You’ll be happy. You won’t take yourself too seriously. You won’t sweat the small stuff. You’ll laugh out loud at the funny voice in your head. You’ll ask a question and receive the answer straight away. You’ll know things without explanation. You’ll understand without having to bring someone over to your perspective. You’ll love and appreciate with reckless abandon and you won’t notice anything other than the beauty inherent in all things. You’ll attend the buffet of life, take only what you desire and ignore the rest. You’ll live in the now. You’ll be the light in the room.

How I finally surrendered:

One day last week I woke up from sleep with the knowing to cancel my plans for the day/night. I decided then and there that I was going to surrender to this thought; to surrender to my inner being forevermore. The time had come to listen to that little voice in my head. That voice has always been there, but I’ve often ignored it, countering its optimism with belittling thoughts. I don’t know why I didn’t think I was good enough to follow through with all of the wonderful ideas that flowed through me, but in that moment I knew I had to be free. I couldn’t deny it any more.

Each morning when I wake up, I reaffirm the desire to give up any resistance to my inner being’s calls. I affirm to do my best to listen and follow through with this incredible gift of guidance. I will lay in bed and meditate until I feel the solid connection between the physical me and the non-physical me. Essentially, I feel for the love that I know is shining down on me. My heart chakra glows outward to the point of pure ecstatic bliss. I can feel my root chakra, sacral, and solar plexus chakras activated and burning bright as well. My throat, third eye, and crown are clear. And then I go through my day as “Source as Amy,” talking to that little voice in my head throughout the day that is so excited to play with me.

There is nothing quite like living your life while fully allowing Source energy to pour through you. I have the best moments ever. Each moment is new and exciting. Each moment is my favourite. Because, even though so many moments are precious and exciting, even looking back to enjoy their deliciousness isn’t as good as feeling fully alive in the present moment.

For the past 2 weeks I have fully allowed myself to let go of the old and to embrace the new. I have met so many new friends. So many of them I had met before, but this time I was ready to let them into my heart. Just yesterday I had the most delicious moment with an older gentleman. He parked his walker beside me and I jumped up to hold the door open for him. “It’s already snowing in Regina,” he said. “Thank you so much. I will make sure I avoid it today.” “Good.” He said. Perfect moment. So much love and fun flowing between us.

The most perfect people flow into my experience, and those who aren’t a vibrational match simply flow by. I fully embrace the knowing that I am pure positive love energy. I don’t trip over my words anymore and can say exactly what I want to say when I wanted to say it. While in France, I spoke perfect French! I tapped into everything I had always been and my mind and words were able to flow with ease. A few days ago I even sang “Here, There, and Everywhere” while walking down the streets of Lido di Venezia without a care in the world. The disconnected me would have been shy and scared to have people listen to me.

One day after meditation, I floated down the stairs and ran smack into Esther. I thanked her for everything she does and she said something like “It’s fun to have fun, isn’t it?” I said, “If I told you about all the fun we’re having I’d be here all day. So I just want to say thank you.” I realized then that she was holding my hands. Such a beautiful experience! What a wonderful memory I will have forever. And it is with excitement that I eagerly anticipate another rendez-vous!

The day I cancelled all of my plans I ended up having a wonderful day walking through Napoli with a new dear friend. We had the best pizza I’ve ever tasted, the best coffee in the cutest alleyway off the beaten path, and afterward went to a beautiful sail away party at sunset. That party led to an incredible dinner and connections I will have for life. The dinner led to a day on a Yacht sailing around Malta the next day and even more love and appreciation for the souls I was coming to know; to remember.

And from there life just keeps getting better and better. My heart is full. The work I have done is radiating out for all to see and for all of my mirrors made of flesh to return to me. My kids are radiating and my partner and I have a greater understanding of what we mean to one another. I love knowing that everything is always working out for me and in the best interest of everyone involved. Life is too precious to spend unhappy and happiness is my greatest goal in life.

Most of all I love how my intentions, no matter how small, played out seamlessly. Like a thought to save someone in particular a seat one day that didn’t work out, worked out the next day without me even trying. I found myself with a front row seat to gift to the most amazing woman ever, just as I had intended.

I especially love the moments of inspiration that don’t make any sense. Everything makes sense in the end! I love that I can continually see the evidence of my alignment, or lack thereof, and that I am able to change my thoughts or my state by simply choosing another thought. If I find myself in a place that I can’t get back from, I just go to bed and start again the next day with meditation and appreciation and the desire to listen to that little voice in my head. Alignment is everything.

Are you Playing a Role? How to Recognize the Ego.

Do you ever catch yourself doing something because you are so caught up in situational social norms? How dedicated are you to playing the role of mother, father, adult, businessman, police officer, hockey ref, Doctor, etc? Do you even realize that you act differently in different social situations? Life is supposed to be fun! Stop taking yourself so seriously all the time.

There is no problem with having a role to play, but when you get so entrenched in a position that you forget WE ARE ALL ONE, the ego is in control. The human race is full of superiority and inferiority because of our human-ness. But if we can take a step back and honour the spirit within; if we can be present for each other and really see each other, we would loosen the hold the ego has on us and come home to the realization that we are all one. We are all equal. We are worthy. Money doesn’t make you worthy. It’s not about knowing more than someone else. It’s about kindness, and compassion, and support. It’s about love.

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When you take anything personally, you know you are in the hold of the ego. When you take life so seriously that it stops being fun, you know you are in the hold of the ego. Any time you feel superior or inferior, you are letting your ego run the show. Ego isn’t all about feeling important. It is in control when you feel like you don’t matter; when you feel people aren’t listening to you; when you feel like you could die and no one would care. The ego is a victim. It likes playing the role of victim and it likes taking advantage of others to make itself feel better or worse.

OK, OK, I GET IT. What can I do about it? You can shine a light on it. Stop doing, and reacting, and simply be present. Any time you recognize that you are playing a game, entrenched in a position, or acting in a certain way without really wanting to, you are taking yourself out of the game. When you start to see the different roles that you play, you are weakening the ego, moving away from collective unconsciousness and becoming a conscious creator.

When you can step away and be who you really are in that moment without the moment dictating what you do; without caring what others think, you are free. When you can be loving and kind when someone blatantly thinks you are a pushover and not care in the least, you are free. When you stop yelling and trying control the situation, and let the situation just be neutral, you are free. When you can be aware of your thinking pattern and know that your thoughts are not who you really are, you are free. You are free when you can have a mean judgemental thought about someone and just laugh at it, because you know one ridiculous thought does not equal who you are!

The thoughts that whiz by in your head all day long are not who you really are. You are the consciousness behind the thoughts. Don’t take your thoughts seriously. Don’t think you are a bad person because you have bad thoughts. We all have egos. We all compare ourselves to others at some time or another, but it’s not who we are! And when you equate yourself to your thoughts, you are not giving your beautiful spirit enough credit. Recognize those thoughts as the ego within, the scared little part of your human-ness that needs to feel special and needs to feel important, and recognize that you are much much more.

Being human is hard work! You are doing a fantastic job! And as you become more aware, you will do even better. The best is yet to come.

What Are You Telling Yourself?

There is a line we’ve been quoting lately from Suits: “Tell yourself whatever you want…as long as you tell it to yourself.”  Such a good show!  All hilarity aside, that line makes me think about our “silent” self talk.  The thing is, there is always someone listening – and that someone is you.  You can focus on what bothers you or you can focus on all of the good things in your life.  You can focus on the trials and tribulations of the past, or you can focus on creating the life of your dreams.   You can focus on the reasons you can’t live the life of your dreams, or you can plow right through the blockages! 

Do people and situations get you down?  People and situations are powerless without your reaction, so don’t give away your power by letting someone or something get under your skin.  Can you see how powerful you are?  Your thoughts are powerful messages to yourself, and you are responsible for how you feel.  How do you want to feel?

Powerful Questions

What are you telling yourself?  Is your mental chatter on the positive side or does it tend to be more negative?  On that note, what do you notice?  Are you constantly judging people and things or are noticing how beautiful our world truly is?  Your thoughts are shaping your reality.  Start paying attention to what floats around in your head!

Cheering myself on: My personal fitness quest

I have an intention to be fitter than I’ve ever been, which means I must take charge of my mental chatter in many, many areas.  What do I tell myself?  For starters, I know that I’m worth it.  I deserve the body of my dreams and I tell myself that I deserve to spend time on something that makes me happy.  No Mommy guilt.  I know that working out will make me happier and more energetic.  Increasing the heart rate increases the amount of oxygen that reaches the cells and working out at a moderate to high intensity will release natural endorphins that makes exercise feel great. 

Since working out makes me happy, I’m always figuring out how I can get my workout in for the day, no matter what the day brings.  If I don’t want to work out, then I know it’s imperative that I work out at the next available opportunity!  I always feel better after.

Today I found myself unable to get to the gym when I wanted so I decided to do some kettlebell swings while the kids played. 96 kettlebell swings, a firetruck repair, a baby down for a nap, 1533 stairs, and 3 Lego Batman car repairs later I finished my hour-long workout.  I did roughly 30 minutes of work, had 30 minutes of rest, burned roughly 525 calories, and managed to give all 3 of my kids attention!  Amazing.

I could have sat on the couch annoyed that I couldn’t go to the gym.  But those actions and emotions wouldn’t make me happy and they certainly won’t get me to my fitness goal.  I’m sure they would have been my modus operandi in the past, but my focus has shifted and I choose to be the best version of myself.  I choose to do things that make me happy.  When that doesn’t seem possible I look for the gratitude in whatever may be hijacking my bliss at that moment.  Trust me, even in the darkest of moments there is gratitude and light to be found, and finding it is definitely worth the effort.  If you’re in a mental rut, the only one who can dig you out of the deep abyss is you.  In these times you must shift your focus.  What you focus on expands, so focus on that which makes you happy.  What you tell yourself is shaping your future; You can either make excuses or you can make plans and follow your bliss.

Sweet Potato Fries with Spicy Cashew Mayo

This is one of my absolute favourite sides to make, and it’s not even for the kids (although they love them too).  They are so simple to prepare and they’ll make you go “mmm soooo good” when you eat them.  The spicy mayo is a grown-up addition.  Unless your kids like to eat fire, they’ll love to dip their fries in the regular cashew mayo instead.

I’ve always loved to eat my fries with mayo, so this recipe let’s me eat “mayo” in front of my kids with zero mommy guilt.  They eat what we eat so it forces us to come up with healthier options for old favourites, which is a very good thing.

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Sweet Potato Fries

  • 2 large sweet potatoes
  • approx. 3 tbsp coconut oil
  • 1/2 tsp sea salt

Preheat oven to 375 F.

Cut sweet potatoes into large chunky french fry shapes roughly the size of your thumb.  Chop off the pointy ends to avoid the ends burning in the oven.

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Place cut fries into a large bowl and top with coconut oil and sea salt.  You do not have to melt the coconut oil first.

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Here’s the fun part: Mix the fries with your hands, making sure they are all covered in sea salt and oil, and then dump them onto a large baking sheet.

Arrange the sweet potato as shown.

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Cook at 375 F for 20 minutes, or until slightly browned on the bottom.  Flip the fries over and cook another 15 minutes until the opposite side is slightly browned.  When done, remove them from the oven and cover with tin foil until ready to enjoy.

 

Spicy Cashew Mayo:

  • 1/2 cup cashew mayo (recipe below)
  • 1/2 tsp chipotle chili pepper powder
  • 1/2 tsp chili powder
  • Tabasco to taste

Put ingredients in a small bowl and stir until combined.  Refrigerate if you have time to let the flavours set, and enjoy with your sweet potato fries!  You’re welcome to use whatever combination of spice you like – I’ve always loved chipotle so it’s what I tend to use in all of my recipes.

 

Cashew Mayo:

  • 1 tbsp apple cider vinegar
  • 3 tbsp lemon juice
  • 1 cup cashews
  • 1/2 cup water
  • 1 tsp fresh thyme
  • 1/2 tsp sea salt
  • 1/4 tsp pepper

Place all ingredients in a high speed blender and blend until smooth.  Refrigerate.

If you don’t have a high-speed blender simply combine all ingredients and let sit for an hour or two before blending.

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All You Have is NOW

In every moment we have the opportunity to be present.  If you’re not careful, your life can pass you by in an instant.  I notice this with my kids every single day.  I am so busy trying to get through the day, making sure that everyone is fed and intact, that I have to remind myself to stop and smell the flowers, aka, find the joy.  It’s not so easy sometimes with 3 little boys who I swear are trying to kill each other off…  So, after I yell at them (I’m working on that, but seriously, 3 boys…) I make sure I tell them that I love them, even though I don’t like their choices sometimes.  Because, I love them, I want them to hear it every single day, and I want to be present with them as much as I can.

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Who/what brings you joy?  Who do you love?  What do you love to do?  What are your goals?  What makes you happy?  If there is one thing that I have learned in life it is this: Find what you love, and love it now.  Show your loved ones that you love them, and show them now.  Daydream about your goals every day, and do something every single day that brings your goals closer to realization.  Be happy now.  I guarantee that if you start doing these things right now that you will bring more happiness into your life immediately.

Asking myself these questions pretty much always leads to me texting Yuri and telling him that I love him – unless he happens to be here, in which case I tell him in person, obviously.  At night, it leads me to the kitchen where I make a Turmeric Latte, and then it leads me to the couch with my computer where I sit down and write.  Before I started writing tonight, I pulled an oracle card from Doreen Virtue’s “Life Purpose” deck.  I was wondering why I even bothered to do so because I knew what card I was going to get.  Sure enough, I pulled the Writing card: “You heal, inspire, teach, and entertain with the words you write.”  Thank God that I know this.

I’ve always known that I loved to write.  It’s too bad that I didn’t think to declare English as my second major in University.  Nevertheless, I am finally listening to my inner voice that tells me to just do it.  I want to write a book.  I want to help people.  Do I know where to start?  Not exactly, but that doesn’t matter.  I’m happy just to write, however, that oracle card was spot on with my intentions.

Who knows what the future has in store for us.  It could be very different from the future we’re imagining.  Anything can happen, so don’t put anything off.  Do it now.  Be happy now.  There is no reason not to live your best life.  If you’re not living you’re best life, then there is something getting in the way, and that can only be you.  If you’re ready to step aside, let your Divine purpose in and let your light shine, then I invite you to try a little exercise before you go to sleep tonight: 

Sit in a quiet room and think about what your ideal life looks like.  Think about it as if it has already happened.  Believe it, and be grateful for this amazing life you lead.  Thank the Universe (or your angels, or God if you’re so inclined) for every aspect of your life as you have imagined it to be.  Give thanks as if it has already come to pass.  Feel how wonderful this feels.  Bring attention to your heart chakra and feel the love in your heart space.  Feel your entire body relax and fill with light.  Know that as you do this, your angels are working very hard behind the scenes to make your vision a reality. 

Be very clear with your vision and your intentions and things will begin to happen.  Make sure that you believe in your vision and most importantly that you believe in yourself.  Believe that you deserve this life.  I will say it a thousand more times until you hear me: You are WORTH it.

It’s no secret that what you think about, you bring about.  What you focus on, expands.  Focus on the bad things and you’ll get more of the same.  Focus on your best life ever and you’ll get more of the same.  This has proven itself to me time and time again.  So I invite you to use your NOW in the most positive and productive way possible, in each moment of each and every day.  And when you think about it, take a moment to envision and be thankful for the life of your dreams.  I can’t think of a better way to go to sleep each night.

 

Enchilada Quinoa Bowls

We LOVE Mexican food, so when I came across the idea to use Quinoa in a Mexican dish, it became an obsession.  I am happy to present you the finished product!  It looks a little overwhelming but once you read through the directions you will realize just how simple I have condensed the steps.

When indulging in cheese we try to opt for goat’s milk cheeses because they are more easily digested by our bodies than cow’s milk products.  As for the sour cream, it didn’t make much sense to make a dairy free version out of cashews if I was already adding cheese…so cow’s milk sour cream it was.

This recipe has a bit of heat so I carefully concocted a separate recipe alongside this to feed to my kids, who then proceeded to steal my spicy dinner instead…

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Enchilada Sauce

  • 1 tbsp butter or coconut oil
  • 1 onion, diced
  • 3 cloves garlic, diced
  • 1 can diced tomatoes (28oz)
  • 1 tbsp cumin
  • 1 tbsp chili powder
  • 1 tsp chipotle chili powder
  • 1 tsp oregano
  • 1 tsp sea salt
  • 1/2 tsp cinnamon

Fry the onion in butter or coconut oil over medium heat until translucent, about 5 minutes.  Add garlic and cook 1 minute longer.  Transfer to a blender and add the rest of the ingredients.  Blend until smooth.  Set aside.

Quinoa

  • 1 cup quinoa
  • 1 tbsp butter or coconut oil
  • 1 onion
  • 3 cloves garlic
  • 1 red pepper, chopped
  • 1 green pepper, chopped
  • 1 zucchini, chopped
  • 2 tomatoes, choppped
  • 2 ears of corn, kernels removed (or 1 cup frozen corn)
  • 2 tsp cumin
  • 2 tsp oregano
  • 1 cup goat cheddar
  • 1 cup goat mozzarella

Place quinoa in a saucepan along with 2 cups of water.  Bring to a boil and then turn down to a simmer.  Once the liquid is almost gone, turn off the heat and cover.

Meanwhile, fry the onion in butter or coconut oil over medium heat until translucent, about 5 minutes.  Add the rest of the ingredients and cook 7-10 minutes or until desired.

Remove from heat, and mix in quinoa along with 2 cups of enchilada sauce.

Place in an oven safe dish and top with cheddar and mozzarella.

Cook at 350 for 10 minutes or until cheese has melted.

Serve topped with extra enchilada sauce and/or cumin sour cream.

Cumin sour cream

  • 1 cup sour cream
  • 1 tsp cumin
  • 1/4 tsp sea salt

Place ingredients in a bowl and mix well.

 

Raw Enchiladas!

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Last night we had the best dinner, and in spite of what you may think it was incredibly easy to put together – but, a dehydrator is a necessity. So if you don’t have one…it’s time to invest in one!  Honestly though, if you don’t have a dehydrator you could just throw the ingredients (plus some fresh corn kernels) in a bowl and have an enchilada salad! 

Easy Raw Corn Tortillas

  • 3 cups of fresh corn kernels
  • 1 cup milled flax seeds
  • 1/4 cup olive oil
  • 1 zucchini, chopped
  • 1/2 tsp sea salt
  • 2 tbsp nutritional yeast
  • 1 1/2 cups water

Place all ingredients in a food processor and pulse until well combined.  Then mix until smooth.

Spread thin on a dehydrator sheet in whatever shape you desire and dehydrate at 110 F for 4-5 hours or until no longer doughy on top.  Flip and dehydrate another 3-4 hours.

Guacamole

  • 1 clove garlic, minced
  • 1 small tomato, chopped
  • 1/4 small red onion, minced
  • juice of 1 lime
  • 3 avocados, mashed with a fork
  • 1/2 tsp sea salt
  • optional: 1 handful of cilantro, roughly chopped

Mash avocados with a fork and then add the rest of the ingredients.  If it doesn’t taste amazing, then there are 2 things you have to play with: the amount of sea salt and the amount of lime juice.  Play with these until this is the best guacamole you’ve ever tasted.

Easy Raw Tomato Sauce

  • 1 cup tomatoes
  • 1/2 cup sun dried tomatoes
  • 1 red pepper
  • dash cayenne

Place all ingredients in a food processor and pulse until desired consistency is reached.

Raw Cashew Cheese Sauce – Seriously the best ever!

  • 1 cup cashews
  • 1/2 yellow pepper
  • 2 tbsp wheat-free tamari
  • 1 tbsp nutritional yeast
  • 1 clove garlic
  • juice of 1 lemon
  • 1/4 tsp turmeric

Place all ingredients in a food processor and pulse until combined, slowly adding water until the consistency you desire is reached, keeping in mind that it will get thicker as it sits and the cashews have a chance to absorb the water.  Alternatively you can also blend in a high speed blender to get a velvet smooth consistency.

 

To assemble the enchilada I just chopped up some lettuce and tossed it on the corn tortilla, layered it with guacamole and rolled it up.  We splashed on the tomato and cheese sauces and quickly took a picture (which is obviously not too artistic) just before our ravenous stomachs got a hold of it!

My Return to Raw: Day Two

Today started with a:

Green Super Smoothie

1 tbsp spirulina
1 mango
1 tbsp bee polin
1 cup strawberries
few cubes ice
1 tbsp chia seeds
2 dates
1 tbsp sesame seeds
water to desired consistency

Then it was off to pick berries at Whittamores Farm on Steeles Ave.  So many delicious berries!  I think we picked for a couple of hours, and I got sunburnt 🙁 but it was worth it.

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