How Do I Enjoy My Own Positivity Without Getting Weighed Down By My Parter’s Negativity?

You actually started answering your own question within the rest of your question! Appreciation will get you a long way with respect to this issue. Appreciate the good father that he is. Appreciate the great man he is and the wonderful things he does. When he is stressing and worrying, gently point out the other side of the coin, yet know when it’s time to understand and not explain anything at all. A lot of couples get caught up in thoughts about what they don’t like about their spouses, and nothing good will ever come of that. You’ve got to appreciate what you love about them and find some lighthearted joy along the way, tending to your own vibration as need be. Daydream about what your perfect relationship looks like and ignore the rest.

It is ok to let yourself be happy while someone right next to you is freaking out. A lot of the time we dim our light because we think it will make someone else feel better, but all it does is make us feel terrible and doesn’t help the situation at all anyway. When someone close to you is disconnected from who they really are, stop paying attention to their current behaviour. Instead, go inward and make the connection to your inner being. Feel what your inner being is feeling and follow the guidance you receive. You will either know what to say or know what to do in that moment. Just follow your intuition whether it makes sense to you or not!

You probably have learned to do this already with your kids! You ignore their tantrums and hold the space for them to return to the angelic beings you know they really are. Do the same thing with your husband. If you let him go on and on complaining about something, you’re enabling this behaviour and it will continue. When you find the connection to your inner being, you are connected to the Source of your guidance. If you need a moment to yourself, take it. At least you can explain the reason you are pulling away; you can have an intelligent conversation with your partner that you are usually unable to have with your kids!

My partner and I agree to call each other out on our bullshit.  It doesn’t mean it’s always well received, but we agree to it and we learn from it.  You can also energetically move the energy around any issue by thinking better feeling thoughts with regard to them such as “I love when my partner tells me about the good parts of his day. I love hearing about all of the things that excite him. I love knowing that no matter how bad his day is, he brings the best of himself home to his family. I love how he can make me laugh, etc.” In time you will get better and better with regard to controlling your thoughts.

If you can control your thoughts with respect to your partner for even the smallest amount of time, you will see change. Do your best to tailor your thoughts to something that is already true for you or else it’s not going to help you because you will know deep down it is a lie. Fake it until you make it just doesn’t work for me. Being true to my heart always does.

Use Distance as a Tool

Put some distance between you and him whenever you feel the need. Your intuition will let you know because you’ll have this nagging pit in your stomach that tells you to remove yourself from an uncomfortable situation. Listen to this feeling and let yourself go!

Meditate, take a shower or bath, or go for a run. Listen to your favourite song really, really loud and dance around the kitchen with headphones on. I can’t tell you how many times going for a run has saved my sanity. Run/walk, whatever. Get some fresh air and clear your mind. It’s as easy as saying “Honey, do you mind if I go for a run?” Done. Answers come to me so easily while I am running. I will know what to say to my partner about a certain issue, or I will know how to deal with a certain issue with my kids, or I’ll get the idea to do something I’d never even considered before which solves a problem I didn’t know I even had. It’s incredible what guidance comes when you make t a priority to listen!

Lead By Example.

In time, your partner will see how calm you are and may start doing the same. He would benefit from a hobby he loves that feeds his spirit. I use the example of running because it’s what I love to do to clear my mind. If he can find something that clears his mind, it will do him (and you) a world of good. Because, if you aren’t doing something to bring yourself into alignment with who you really are, you’re grasping at straws and won’t have anything to give anyone else anyway. When you’re not in alignment, worry, fear, and anxiety easily take hold. When you’re in alignment, worry, fear, and anxiety don’t even exist. Love always prevails in the state of alignment.

There is no need to think about your problems when you run/exercise. Just clear your head and listen for your guidance. Your guides know more about you than you do. They also know the shortcut to everything you have ever asked for. I’m not entirely sure we need to think about anything ever again. Just ask to find solutions and listen for the answers to come. Expect them to come.

When you wake up in the morning, before you mentally jump into your to-do list, just lay there and listen for the answers to come. If you are working on your receptivity to your guidance, the fuzzy area between the awake and sleep states is a great time to allow this clarity to wash over you.

Perception is Tricky

We often create problems in our own minds that have no basis in reality. Communication is the key. Have a problem in your relationship? Talk about it. It doesn’t matter if it’s big or small. If it’s dragging you down, it’s worth getting it out in the open. When issues have roots, you’ve got to address them. Just find your alignment and then raise the issue with your partner when you are in a good feeling place about it.

I know a lot of spiritual teachers will tell you to stop looking at a problem and focus on the solution, which is valid for sure, but sometimes you just can’t get your mind off something and not talking about it ends up hurting the relationship. I have had much quicker success in my own life by addressing my issues with honesty and the knowing I have in my heart. It has made my parter and I closer than I ever thought possible.

Go with your own personal guidance in this area. No matter what anyone says, its always best to go with your intuition. What’s best for me may not me best for you. Some issues I can ignore and they work themselves out, while others just keep coming back around. If they keep coming back, it may be time to talk about them.

Permission to Thrive

You need to give yourself permission to thrive no matter what. If it means your partner stays where he is and you outgrow him, so be it. You have to follow your truth and you can’t expect everyone to come with you. I don’t think we are meant to have the same partner for life. I think the right partners come in at the right time. It doesn’t mean that you can’t have the same partner for life, but it means that you have to accept that you will have periods of exponential growth that occur at different times. A friend told me that the trick to staying together long-term is “we never fell out of love with each other at the same time.”

Connect to your inner being. Follow your heart. Speak your truth. Take care of yourself. Know that everything is always working out for you. And look for the evidence of it all day, every day.

xo Amy

 

Is Your Story Serving You?

My story is inspiring. It’s incredible. And yet as inspiring and uplifting as my story is, it never feels good to talk about it. To be completely honest, looking back at it in any capacity at all doesn’t feel good!

As amazing as your story may be, looking back at it brings the past into the present moment. As uplifting as the message is, bringing any pain into the present moment just doesn’t feel good. When you claim the past in the present, you are muddying up the perfection that is now. It feels so good to be in the now, where anything and everything is possible.

When you breathe deeply and claim “I am here now in the present moment,” you open space in your physical body to flow Source energy. “I am Source in the present moment” is even more powerful. You are spirit flowing through a physical body. You cannot NOT be connected to Source. You are Source. That will never change.

Obviously, you can do as you wish. I just want you to bring your attention to how you feel when you go into detail about things that are not working in your life. How does it make you feel? Perhaps you would feel better if you focused on the solution to what is not working? Once you have felt the pain of a situation, it’s time to focus on feeling better. You know what you don’t want, so what do you want?

People are going to do what they’re going to do and there is nothing you can do to change it. But you can change your reaction to it and you can change what you think about. When I’m hurting for whatever reason, I choose to fantasize about things that I really want to feel. You can start anywhere and get a pretty good rampage of appreciation going with just a little bit of focus and the intention to feel better.

Here’s an example of my mental game when I was at the lowest point in my life:

“I know that I’m going to be happy. When I am on the other side of this, it’s going to feel really good. I am so lucky to have my boys. I am so lucky that they chose me to be their mom! They are so precious and beautiful inside and out. I love that when I hug them, I can easily connect to Source energy. I know that there is so much more for me. I love knowing that I can connect to this Source whenever I choose. I love knowing that everything is always working out for me, even though I can’t see it yet. I know that there is so much working out for me right now that I can’t see! How amazing is it to know that we are truly loved regardless of what other humans are saying and doing? I love that I can feel whole and complete all on my own. How amazing is it that I have so much to look forward to in this life? I know that I created this and I take full responsibility for myself. It is so empowering to know that I create my own reality!”

I have no idea what caused me to catapult into this knowing, but I knew. I opened up to spirit so intensely and so easily. I imagine it is because I was never that far away from it, and my desire to feel good had never been stronger in that moment of pain. I was asking, they were responding, and in my desire to feel better I let it in.

Negative thinking is just a habit, and a habit can be changed – especially when you recognize what is going on at an energetic level. If thoughts are energy, and energy is everything in this vibrational Universe, your thoughts are creating your reality. The things you say are creating your reality. The frequency you hold is creating your reality.

Each moment is a new opportunity to create a different reality from the one you are currently in. The present moment is all you have. It is the point of creation. So, what do you want to do with it? Do you want to complain? Do you want to talk about what people have done in the past to hurt you? Do you want to yell at your kids?

Or, do you want to appreciate? Do you want to love? Do you want excitement? Do you want to open your heart? Do you want to feel good? Do you want to create something new?

I want to love. I want to open my heart. I want to live my life flowing Source energy. I want to feel connected to all that is. I want to thrive. I want my sons to thrive. I want to be incredibly blissfully happy. I want to have a relationship with my partner that is full of passion. I want to tap into my inner being’s perspective and to live a life full of precious  gifts – moments that I couldn’t plan if I tried from my human perspective. I want to trust that everything is always working out for me. I want to know that everything is always really ok. I want to live life knowing that there is never any risk.

Now, if we bring all of those wants into this feeling moment, it would sound something like this:

I love loving. I love living my life with an open heart. I love feeling Source energy flow through me. I love being connected to all that is. I love thriving in this time space reality. I love that my children are thriving and that I am incredibly blissfully happy. I love that my relationship is full of passion and love. I love those moments when I am at one with my inner being’s perspective, when my heart is glowing with pure love and joy, and I love seeing the manifestations of my vibration. I trust that everything is always working out for me. I love knowing that there is no risk. I love knowing that there is nothing to fear. All is well.

xo Amy

Q&A: How Do I Stop Feeling Like I Can Never Catch Up?

Busyness is an epidemic in our society. Everyone is so busy doing that they’re missing the point of being in the moment. The key to taking control of your crazy life, just like anything else, lies in your heart.

Wherever you are, you can get to where you want to be. It helps if you have a specific goal in mind but it’s not necessary. Simply knowing what you want to feel is good enough. For instance, you may know that you want to be a painter, so you paint when you feel the inspiration. If you don’t have “time” – make time. Schedule it in. If you don’t know what is it you are looking for, you can appreciate the feeling of how you want to feel. For instance, you can feel what it wold feel like to have unlimited time, ease, love, connection, and excitement.

All of this is going to come together via the Law of Attraction. Like attracts like. The vibration you put out is the one you receive. Things are always in a state of change. Nothing ever stays the same. But, you may not notice the change because things are changing to more of the same and more of the same and more of the same.

“Work is hard.” “I hate my job” “I never have enough time” etc. are thoughts that are going to change to more and more of the same. If you can practice feeling appreciation and joy in your daily experience, it will raise your vibration enough so that as time passes, you will see palpable change. Happier people will enter into your experience. There will be more laughing and more spontaneity. In general, you will feel more excitement in your life.

Over time, you will begin to notice how your thoughts create your reality. And in greater time, you will see just how powerful of a co-creator you really are. Eventually you will come to know that you can be, do, or have anything you desire because your life experience will show you time and time again that you get what you think about whether you want it or not.

The easiest way to get the momentum rolling in the right direction is to take time every single morning to make sure you get out of bed with the right mindset. If you wake up with a  debilitating thought, take the time to think of a better feeling thought on that subject, or choose another subject all together. I recommend leaving your thoughts on any subject in a better feeling place because it is incredibly empowering to know that you are in charge of your thoughts and that they are not in charge of you. Plus, it feels better!

Tips for improving your current job:

  1. Set the intention when you go to bed to wake up in a good mood, full of energy and enthusiasm for your job in the morning. Intention is everything. Most people pre-pave their days full of dislike for their jobs. This is your chance to choose your own adventure the day before.
  2. If you wake up in dread with the thought of going to work, wake up 45 minutes earlier and go for a quick run. Movement of the body is important to move energy, so if you can swing it, get yourself moving!
  3. If working out sounds impossible, (I can literally hear you groaning) choose any thought about your job that you really like. Appreciate how good that thought feels and appreciate the people who make your job fun.
  4. Meditate. Set your alarm for 15-20 minutes and sit with the intention to simply be. Breathe deeply and feel for the love that is omnipresent. Focus on your heart chakra and let in the love.
  5. Appreciate all day long. Especially when you notice negative thoughts. Even people you have always perceived as completely awful will change right before your eyes if you only see the good in them and find things to appreciate. And when a compliment for someone pops into your head, share it! You are an uplifter at heart!

And last but not least, take time for yourself. Put yourself first. It’s not selfish to do what you want to do. It’s IMPERATIVE to being happy. Take care of yourself and do what makes you happy. If you don’t do this, you won’t have any energy to give anyone else anyway. This means saying NO to a lot of thing you are currently saying YES to and regretting. If it’s not a HELL YES it’s a HELL NO. Remember this one thing alone and I guarantee you will catch up and feel an immediate increase of joy in your daily life!

The happier you are, the more tapped into your spirit you will be, and the easier it will be for you to hear the inspiring thoughts your spirit is constantly sharing with you. This is why meditation is so important. It is an open invitation to spirit. When you quiet your mind, you are better able to hear your guidance. Spiritual guidance is not reserved for psychics and mediums. If you are a human on Earth, you have spiritual guidance because the “spirit you” thought the “physical you” into being. And that same energy that created you is flowing through you now, creating with your thoughts and your overall vibration. The frequency you emit is what the law of attraction responds to in each and every waking moment.

Pay attention to that little voice in your head. Most thoughts that feel really, really good to you are actually guidance from spirit. Spirit knows exactly what you want and how to get it to you in the easiest of ways, but often we ignore these amazing thoughts and counter them with thoughts like “I can’t do that”. Yes, you can. If you received and inspiring thought, you can do it. Think about it some more and get really excited about it. You can be, do, or have anything you desire. All you have to do is align with your spirit on a daily basis and let it all in. You don’t even need to think anymore. You just have to be happy and let the law of attraction and spirit show you the way!

The Number 666 and Counting Your Blessings

When I lazily checked my messages just over a week ago, I never expected what I heard. “Amy, it’s mom. Call me back as soon as you can.” My stomach dropped as I returned the call. Who? What was it?

The who was my aunt. And it was a stroke. Having been an OR nurse for more than 30 years, she had been able to tell my uncle that she was having a stroke while it was happening. He immediately saw it on her face and had her at the hospital in less than 10 minutes.

I’ve been to the hospital twice to visit her this week. The first time was the day after it happened. She was able to speak when spoken to and her humour was intact. “I’m so happy to see you.” I said. “I’m happy you can still see me.” She replied.

The second time was Thursday, nearly 5 full days after it happened. She was able to carry on a conversation for nearly 2 hours with me. Her memory is intact and she is grateful to be alive. She knows it’s going to be a long road to recover but she also knows she’s going to do it. Thank God for her belief. She’s tapping into who she really is.

Being an empath, I know how important it is for me to get into a strong emotional place before getting anywhere near a hospital. Tapping into the fear and sadness that is floating around is a strong possibility if I don’t raise my vibration and shield myself against it.

I purposely chose my crystal bracelets to support me that morning, and kept repeating over and over in the car: “Everything is always working out for me. Everything is always working out for me.” It’s how I shut off my mind and tap into my spiritual truth. Eventually I settled into the meditation of driving and made peace with the quiet around me. I started listening to one of Abraham-Hicks’ rampages of appreciation and the tone was set. Everything is really ok. There is nothing wrong. It’s not denial. It’s knowing that even though there may be a problem with the physical body, the spirit cannot be harmed.

somuch

This type of contrast creates a massive desire for wellness. I’m sure my aunt’s desire to be well has never been greater. I know my desire to keep my thoughts in a high vibrational place has never been higher. It is my intention to hold the space for her to be who she really is – full of love and light and completely whole. I know that I create my own reality and I know the power of my thoughts. Looking at my aunt and crying about her current physical state won’t help. She is not her physical body and it has nothing to do with who she really is. When I think of her, I think of her healthy. I think of her strong personality and her strong will. In my mind’s eye, I see her walking and talking and having a good time.

I talked with her like I’ve always talked with her. I didn’t feel the need to yell or talk to her like she was a toddler, which all of the nurses were doing…why? I never understood that. I talk to everyone like they’re 30 and adjust as necessary.  All I did was encourage her and help in any way I could. This meant counting each and every blessing with her. There wasn’t a pity party because my energy wouldn’t allow it. It was easy to lead her into appreciation because in that moment she was already there. There will be moments of depression and sadness for sure, but I know my energy brought forth hope and a lot of love. I gave her a neck and shoulder massage with essential oils (thankfully I had some in my purse!) and gave her drops of water on a sponge. I wish I could have done more but I did what I could.

On the drive home I saw so many 666 licence plates that I lost count. I’ve seen them everywhere since. And I was thinking about my aunt today when I saw one. I was turning into my son’s school to pick him up and there it was: 666. And I kid you not, when I left the school 10 minutes later, the first licence plate I saw read AAA 666. I can’t make this stuff up! The number 666 reminds me not to get caught up in what I see. What ‘is’ doesn’t matter. What ‘is’ gives us a starting point so we can think about where we want to be and what we want to create in our lives. It helps us to carve out where we want to be. The real magic happens when we start moving toward what we want to create.

I know we are eternal beings and I know that all is well. I know that death isn’t real. It’s just an address change. We take the lessons and the love and leave our aging bodies behind. I could be sad. But why? I’ve let myself mourn the aunt I knew for a few passing moments and each time it felt awful. It’s not who she is. So I change my thoughts and find the blessings. I know that more love is going to be born out of this situation than if it hadn’t happened. I know that the desire for a healthy body is greater than it’s ever been within everyone around her. I know that the blessings will become greater and greater.

She doesn’t want me to see her like this. It’s not who she is. And I told her that I know. I told her that I see her full of love and light and that I know who she really is. We cried together for a brief moment as we hugged. There is no shame in what her physical body is going through. None at all. She is so much more than her physical body.

When she fell asleep I wrote her a mantra on a piece of paper and left it beside her. Even if she didn’t read it, the intention was there with her in that room. I can’t remember it exactly but it went something like this:

“I love knowing that my body is getting stronger every single day. I love knowing that there is no action I must take. I love knowing that my higher self is in control of this healing energy and I welcome it wholeheartedly. I am so appreciative of all of the nurses and doctors who are doing everything they are inspired to do to help me recover as quickly as possible. I love knowing that they are being Divinely guided. I love knowing that we are all in this together. I love knowing that everyone is looking out for me. I love knowing that my family is here for me. I love feeling loved. I love loving. I love knowing that everything is really all right. I love knowing that everything is always working out for me and I look forward to seeing the evidence of it working out for me all day every day.”

What I know for sure is that our thoughts create our reality. The whys of life don’t matter as much as what we’re going to do about where we are now. I know that life is what we make it. We can’t change the past, but we can change the trajectory of the future in an instant. I know that everything is always working out for us, and I know that the answer to everything is love. I know that love is all around us. I know that the propensity for us is to be healthy. And I know that we are never alone. We are constantly being guided by immensely loving beings. We just have tap into it. Love is the key to everything.

 

Guidance is Everywhere. Listen.

I took my 3 young boys to the the dentist today, taking a bullet that I didn’t want to take because sometimes I have to be something we call an “adult”. I don’t feel like an adult. Does anyone? Every few weeks I have a moment where I think “how do I have 3 kids?!” One day you have no kids and the next you’re entire world is upside down and ruled by a 7lb scream machine. There’s no test. There should be a test!

When I went to the school to pick up my 2 oldest for lunch before the dentist, I had a quick chat with another mother. A mother that I actually met at an airport in Barbados I might add. We ended up renting in the same condo building down there. Then a few days after we returned home, I saw her walking down my street. Apparently we never had the “where are you from?” conversation. The Universe amazes me with its little games every single day.

She told me that she’s been picking up her kids for lunch for years. And I told her that this is the second time I’ve ever done it. I have no problem telling my children that they’re going to eat lunch in the school cafeteria with the rest of the kids. It’s good for me, and what’s good for me is good for them. If I had to pick them up every single day I would be a mess! No just no. Not happening.

She told me that when it gets cold it’s really hard to have to pick them up for lunch. So I suggested that when it gets cold she should tell them that it’s time for them to stay for lunch. I wanted to open up the space for her to make her own decision, but let her know that if it’s making her unhappy in any way, she should allow herself the freedom to do what feels better. Something prompted me to sit beside her. Spirit is always guiding us. I was her flashing red light of guidance with a message she was ready to hear. But, we have to take action on our guidance. I say what I feel inspired to say, and I don’t take it personally when people don’t hear what I say, but the pull to sit beside her was so strong and the conversation guided itself. Pure inspiration: in spirit.

guidance

Leaving my kids at school for lunch time gives them time to play, and me and extra hour and a half of work each day. They play outside for 30 minutes before they eat. If I picked them up they’d miss out on valuable exercise and fun! Also, it makes the times I DO pick them up extra special. The last time I picked up Oscar for lunch, we went on a little date to the French Restaurant behind our house. He was so excited, and so was I. It was valuable 1 on 1 time that we rarely get and I’m excited to do it again 🙂

Talking with this mother for a few minutes made me reevaluate my entire life. Is it making you reevaluate your own? Is there anything you’re doing now that you don’t want to do? Is there any way to shift the responsibility in any way to give yourself more freedom and relief? I even called my Cable/Internet provider and changed my plan to save me $45 a month because I don’t want to pay for a phone line we don’t use and channels we don’t watch. That’s $540 a year!

If there is anything that has been on your mind lately that you want to change, do it now. It’s so much less painful when you listen to your guidance and follow through with action than if you let it eat away at your soul for the next weeks, months, and years. Just as I wrote that, I got the feeling that I need to go to the dentist. That is my guidance system chiming in with something that needs to be done. I’ve been saying for way too long that I need to go, so in the spirit of this message (and the honouring of spirit’s message) I will take my own advice and make an appointment tomorrow!

What thoughts and feelings are popping into your head? What do you need to change? What needs completion? What “adulting” have you been putting off? Listen to those thoughts and feelings, that guidance, and TAKE ACTION!

 

You Can Never Go Back.

you-can-never-go-back

It’s been 5 months to the day since my last blog post. It’s not for lack of desire. My desire to write has never been greater these past months. It’s not a lack of time either, because time is infinite. I have nothing but time. But the Divinity of it has finally come around I think.

Life is changing. It can never be the same. We are always in a state of learning. And once you learn something, it’s impossible to unlearn.

Over these past months, I have been focused on listening to my spirit; those feelings deep within that cannot be denied. But something really surprises me: So many of us deny our gut feelings. Sometimes I still do. Why is this? I think it’s because we’re trained as kids to make others happy.

I see it every day with my kids. They want to do XYZ, and I want them to do ABC. I’m learning how to navigate life with 3 little boys who have 3 strong spirits, and it gets messy. But I don’t want them to EVER grow out of following their bliss, for me or anyone else. But I do want them to be kind while they listen to their Hell Yes’…we’re working on it…

What are gut feelings? I’ve come to understand them as messages from Spirit, and the more you deny them, the worse you’re going to feel. When something feels wrong, it is. When something feels right, it is. Your emotions are guidance from Spirit. When someone asks you to do something for them and you don’t have that “Hell Yes!” visceral response, say NO.

Don’t be a people pleaser. Don’t sacrifice your feelings and needs to make someone else happy. The thing is, you can never make anyone happy. It’s not your job. It’s theirs. And if they don’t like it, that’s their problem too.

We’ve gotten really good at denying spirit in our society. We know what we should do and we don’t do it. We know what we need to say and we don’t say it. We know that we need to be true to ourselves and we don’t BE it. We deny our true selves so often that we’ve become incredibly unhappy.

Do you want to be happy?

The time has come for you to give yourself permission to say what you want to say, do what you want to do, and be what you want to be. Learn to listen to your Spirit, and watch miracles happen. Once you start listening to your Spirit, life will get better and better at an incredible speed. It’s time to start getting really, really excited.

Set yourself up for success.

Every morning when I wake up , I think about how good my day is going to be. I get excited about the possibilities and ask spirit to surprise me. And every day is a good day. Even then, life happens. I may have yelled at my kids for an hour today…maybe even more. It didn’t feel good and I didn’t really care because I know I am fully capable of digging myself out of that rut. On the other side of discomfort is pure delight – because joy is my intention. My spirit was saying no to where I was, so I asked for a way out. Moments later I got the idea to cut the grass. So I cut my grass. Then I cut the neighbour’s grass, and then I raked everything up. I did it in bare feet too so I could connect with the earth and ground myself.

When you are down, you don’t need to live there. Being down is actually really great because you have the contrast to find something that lifts you up! It’s such an amazing feeling to know you have the power to create your reality. It’s so empowering to climb out of that hole and back up the mountain. And if there is one thing I know for sure, it’s that from the top of the mountain, you can see all the bad stuff coming.

Every day in ANY way, my suggestion to you is to find your way up the mountain. Find any way to make yourself happy, and then sit there and bask in it. From your happy place, you can see all the discomfort coming. When you’re in joy and your boss asks you to work on the weekend, it’s going to feel terrible. Say no. From your place of joy, watching Narcos is going to feel terrible. Turn it off. From your place of joy, a friend calling and complaining about her husband is going to feel terrible. Either change the subject or fake your death. ha! Or you could always just excuse yourself politely and hang up 🙂

And that’s not all. From your place on top of the mountain, there will be a lot of things that once bothered you that you won’t even notice anymore. When you are in a good feeling place, only people who are on the same level can see you. People who are not on your level will not even come near you. They’ll basically be out of sight and out of mind somewhere on the ground, and you won’t even be able to interact with them. You’ll be hanging out with other mountaineers.

And when you fall off the mountain, you’ll know it! And so begins the work of getting back on top. It’s the human journey. When you fall off, getting back up is as easy as quieting your mind and listening for spirit. Listen to those gut feelings. Ask what you can do to feel better and listen to what comes. Every time you ask, the answer is given. Every time. <3

How to Lose Weight the Easy Way

They’re everywhere this time of year: Guilt, self-hatred, loathing, disgust, comparison, anorexia, bulimia, girls starving themselves, boys starving themselves, bingeing, more self-hatred, more disgust, more comparison, and more loathing.

What if, we just stopped? What if we could love ourselves just as we are? What if we could focus on all that we are rather than all we are not? What if we are perfect right now, right in this moment?

Let me tell you something: You are perfect.

And, you are not your body. You are the spirit inside the body. You can think of your body as a rental. It’s where you live right now, but it is not who you are. When you can love the spirit who resides in that body of yours, you can start to look past its “clothing” and see who you really are. So, body aside, who are you?

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Who you really are is a being of light and love. You are eternal. You are going about this world in a slight state of amnesia. You purposely chose this lifetime to learn for the advancement of your soul. Your inner being, that part of you that is still in spirit form, is nudging and guiding you constantly to help you remember who you are.  All you have to do is listen to that little voice in your head that you try to ignore.

Your inner being is that voice that wants to quit your job and work with horses. It’s that feeling you get when you get all warm and fuzzy and think about your deepest dreams. Your inner being wants to kiss more, cuddle more, visit with friends more, and eat and drink foods that taste amazing. It wants to go for long walks, have soul inspiring conversations, and have meaningful mind-blowing sex. It wants you to follow those sparks of inspiration that you ignore out of fear.

When you’re doing things that make you happy, you’re more aligned with who you really are. When you are feeling sadness, guilt, or fear, you are thinking or doing something that your inner being doesn’t agree with. When you are standing in front of the mirror criticizing your body, you feel bad. You feel bad because your inner being disagrees with you in that moment. Your inner being sees the perfection that you are. When you are comparing yourself to others, thinking you are fat and they are perfect, you feel bad. Once again, your inner being disagrees.  It knows that your body is not who you are, and it knows that you are perfect.

When you feel guilty, your inner being feels love. When you feel fat, your inner being feels love. When you feel disgusted, your inner being feels love. When you hate yourself, your inner being feels love. Do you see a pattern yet?

Your inner being loves you unconditionally. The more you can love yourself unconditionally, the more in alignment you will be with your spirit, and the happier you will become. And though self-love is probably the best thing in the whole entire world, an amazing side effect occurs when you love yourself unconditionally:

You lose weight.

When you love yourself, you will take care of yourself. Foods that used to taste good won’t taste good anymore. You’ll spend long hours doing something you love and you’ll forget all about food. Have you ever been doing something that you were so passionate about that you forgot to eat? Or, you’ll go out with friends and eat anything and everything you want and you won’t stress about it! The freedom you will feel!

We overeat because there is something missing in our lives. We’re bored. We’re looking for the next best thing to love or the next person who can give us love and attention because we’re starving for it. We are so starved for love and affection because we’ve been withholding it from ourselves for so long. We’ve neglected our inner being. We’ve stuffed food down our throats to appease that uneasy feeling inside, but not listening to that feeling inside is why we’re feeling uneasy in the first place! And then society shames us for being fat and so we shame ourselves because we’ve learned that’s what we’re supposed to do.

Your inner being is trying to get your attention. That uneasiness you feel can only be calmed one way, and that is by listening to it and changing course. If thinking a certain thought feels bad, choose another thought. Choose loving thoughts about your body and see your body change. Send your body love, and it will respond by loving you back. Stop being so hard on yourself and shift the momentum in a loving direction. Take your power back from society and start loving the spirit you are, just as your inner being does: unconditionally.

Action steps:

Tonight when you go to bed, list all of the reasons why you love yourself. What went really well today? What were your successes?

Next, appreciate your body for all that it does for you. Thank your lungs for breathing, and your feet for carrying you through the day. Thank your knees for supporting you and your hands and arms for the ability to hug others. Thank your eyes for seeing and your tongue for tasting. Touch your body and thank it for being your home in this lifetime. Touch your breasts and acknowledge their beauty. Thank them for feeding your babies and send them love. Send all of your body parts love. They are beautiful. You are beautiful – just the way you are.

 

Change your Thoughts to Change Your Life

All it takes is a simple change of thoughts to change your life. Just a little pivot here and there can bring you great joy. When you pay attention to how you feel and consistently change your thoughts so that you feel better, life gets really good – and it’s not as hard as you may think it is!

Here are the basics: whenever you feel bad, your thoughts are not serving you. Pick a new thought. Start anywhere. You can even start with, “I am so lucky to be able to choose what I think about! I may as well think something fun. What would be fun? I think I’m going to eat my favourite thing for dinner. Oh wow, the weather is really beautiful today. I think I’ll go for a walk on my lunch hour.” Keep the momentum going.  Go general like that if you can’t think of something specific. And be truthful. Don’t say anything you don’t believe because it won’t feel good. The idea is to think thoughts that make you feel good. If you go off on a tangent, get back on track!

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There really is no sense being in a bad mood when you can choose to be happy instead. Whenever I find myself in a bad mood whether I know the reason or not, I call on Archangel Michael to cut the ethereal cords of attachment. I wave my hand in front of my heart and ask that all energetic cords be severed and that my energy be mine alone.  Then I shake out any residual negative energy by shaking my hands and setting the intention to release it.

If I’m standing I will bounce up and down if possible. If I’m in the car, which is when I need to do this the most due to Toronto traffic – I will shake out my hands at a stop sign or red light. If you end up adopting these habits, don’t worry if other people are around.  You can either worry about what other people think, or you can feel better, but you can’t do both.

A note on worrying what others think… It is not worth your time nor your energy!  There is no basis of your worry thought in reality and chances are people are not even thinking about you – they’re thinking about them! If you really want to know what someone close to you is thinking – then ASK them! Most often we create a “reality” in our heads that is nowhere near the truth. Communication is key in relationships. All relationships. Either let it go on your own or clear the air verbally and then get back to whatever it is that makes you happy!

Love and Light, xo.

 

Is Your Inner Child Running Your Life?

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Whether we realize it or not, we carry a lot of baggage from the past. The abandonment we felt as children when our parents wouldn’t play with us, the betrayal we felt when our best friend chose to sleep over at someone else’s house instead of ours, and the sadness we felt when our beloved pet suddenly died – all reside deep within our subconscious mind.

Our inner child learns that we need to perform spectacularly if we want more attention. We become perfectionists. We learn that negative attention is better than no attention at all. We lash out in anger. We internalize the external, (I guess I’m not good enough to have Daddy’s attention), take things far too personally, and begin to talk badly to ourselves.

That inner child stays with us, yearning for the love, connection, and safety that eluded it over the years. When we lash out in anger at the smallest of details, it is a red flag that we have neglected our inner being for far too long. When we berate others for their shortcomings it is simply because we can’t stand to look at our own. We deflect. It’s much easier to point out what others are doing wrong than own up to our own failures. The funny thing is, others mirror our faults back to us. Whatever bothers us about someone is something that we need to work on!

Our actions are a direct representation of the way we feel about ourselves. The way we hold ourselves in public reflects the emotional terrain of our inner world. When we feel poorly about ourselves we tend to lash out at anyone near us – especially the ones we love. They have a front row seat to our baggage show. Our flipping out has nothing to do with the empty toilet paper roll, and everything to do with our need for love, connection, and fulfillment. 

Denial of our problems is not a long term solution. Problems get bigger the longer we let them fester, not smaller. The fastest, easiest, and least painless way to deal with our inner unrest is to simply listen to it and begin to take care of the inner child that is begging to be heard, that inner being – the real you – that needs love and attention.  Your inner being doesn’t need love and attention from just anyone, it needs it from YOU.

Now that you’re an adult, it is your responsibility to meet your inner being’s deepest emotional needs. If you don’t take responsibility for fulfilling these needs, the unrest will only worsen until there is a complete blowout (divorce, mid-life crisis, job termination, etc.) and you have no choice but to comply.

You are the only one who can give you what you need. When you take your power back from others and realize that you are fully capable of nurturing your inner being, your whole life will change. As you start to listen to your inner being you will build awareness around what it needs to feel happy, safe, and fulfilled. Take some time to reflect on where you are and where you want to be, and when you are the most you – what makes you really light up? Get silent sit in meditation, and let the answers come.

As you begin to act on this new awareness and the information it provides, you will feel whole, complete, safe, secure, and loved all on your own. You won’t feel the need to lash out at others because you will be following your heart, giving your inner being the love and attention it so desires. You won’t need to point out what everyone else is doing wrong because you won’t even notice it. In time, rather than focusing on everything that is going wrong, you will be excited about everything that is going right!

When you provide your inner being with unconditional love, you create a space within you to freely love others, flaws and all.  When you love yourself, you don’t need to take power from others, for you will have all of the power you need already within.  As you sit in the seat of awareness, always listening to your inner being, you are able to thwart or deal with perceived attacks on your inner being as they arise. Though the inner work never ends, neither do the soul-fulfilling payoffs, authentically beautiful relationships, love and peace it provides your inner being.

Whenever your inner being is feeling insecure, unloved, unfulfilled, or uneasy, you can acknowledge the feeling, knowing that you are a limitless being full of love and creative power. Focus on your strengths. Focus on the solutions to the problems and the best possible outcomes.  Focus on the inner being and follow your heart.  It will never steer you wrong. Take a deep breath, push through your fears and remind yourself that “All is well. There is nothing to fear. I’ve got this.”

Material Objects as Life Purpose Replacements

Symptoms of detachment from spirit can feel like anxiety, fear, sadness, discontent, failure, and discomfort, among others. This happens when we get sidetracked from our right and perfect path and take a detour through procrastination and other behaviours that don’t serve us.  The discontent will simply keep growing until you answer the call to get back on track and serve your life’s purpose.

If you feel a deep longing to do something fulfilling with your life but let your fears talk you out of taking action, you can get stuck for a very long time between the fear of moving forward and the fear of staying the same.  Your discomfort is caused by not keeping up with your soul’s lessons.

As you learn in this lifetime, you are constantly outgrowing your old circumstances and gearing up to change, to grow, to learn, and to master each new level you encounter.  Your guides and angels leave little clues and synchronistic events along the way to make life fun and exciting, and even extremely hard if you must learn a difficult lesson.  It is all for your greatest good.

Though you may not consciously know what you are longing for, taking courageous action toward what feels good each and every day can illuminate the path ahead.  One day, when you look back to where your journey began, you will do so in awe of the cascade of fortunate encounters and events that guided you right to where you wanted to be!

If you know what you desire, yet aren’t taking action, the discomfort will only grow until you listen to your authentic self and start making changes in your life.  No matter how hard some decisions may initially seem, the pain you will endure from not taking action will eventually become so extreme that you have to change.

File 2015-05-15, 11 20 49 AMThe Universe will support you always. 

We all have a little voice in our head that cheers us on.  This inner voice tells us when something needs to change and when we need to take action. It always has our best interest at heart. We also have a little voice that tells us we are not good enough – this is the voice of fear and anxiety, and the more attention you give it, the stronger it will get.  Take your power back from this voice and take action in the direction of your bliss. You are and always have been worthy.

There is a lot of fear entwined with change, but there doesn’t have to be. Fear and anxiety can’t survive the light.  They will disappear the second you acknowledge your worthiness and take action toward your dreams. Use them to guide you out of your comfort zone – you really have nothing to lose but your discomfort, and you have a lifetime of happiness to gain!

It all comes down to this:

You can either listen to the unrest and question it, asking yourself what kind of life you must live in order to feed your spirit and live with passion, or you can continue to live in denial and room with anxiety, fear, and discontent.  If you choose the latter, you will certainly feel the pain of disconnection and try to remedy the pain by acquiring material objects.

Material Objects as Life Purpose Replacements

  • Do you have a lot of stuff?
  • Do you have a need to shop?
  • Do you feel fulfilled in your life?
  • Are you constantly fearful and anxious?
  • How are your relationships?
  • Do you think about why you are buying something before you complete the purchase?
  • Do you need to buy something to be happy?
  • Are you feeling inspired or blocked in your life?
  • Do you have a lot of energy or is your body tired and stagnant?
  • What do your closets look like?
  • Is your house clean?

Are you numbing yourself by acquiring material objects?  Do you try to cover up your pain, fear, and anxiety by purchasing items to gain happiness?  Until you listen to your spirit and pursue your life’s purpose, the high you get from buying things will come and go hundreds of times until you wake up to the truth that nothing outside of you can make you happy. Happiness has been and will always be an inside job. Listen to your spirit.

Not only will objects not make you happy in the long run, but the more stuff you have, the more energy if takes from you. The more electronics you have, the more responsibility you have in making sure they run properly. The more cars you have, the more insurance you must buy and the more upkeep you must perform or delegate.

The more pets you have, the more you must feed them, walk them, and seek veterinary care. The more clothing you have, the more clothing you must wash/dry/fold/dry clean/repair. The more stuff you have laying around your house, the more stuff you have to dust, and the harder it is to find anything anywhere!

Material accumulation is a symptom of spiritual disconnection – a symptom of not fulfilling your life’s purpose.

When I am feeling stuck and anxious, it is almost always because I have been hanging out with my fears and not pursuing my life’s purpose. The only thing that truly makes me feel better is listening to my inner guidance and taking action on it. For instance, I may be procrastinating by cleaning the house instead of writing. This little voice in my head tells me that I need to write. About a minute after I sit down at my computer and begin to type, all fear and anxiety disappear and I feel completely connected to my spirit and my life’s purpose once again. I know I am following my life’s purpose because it makes me happy.

Maybe you have a habit of numbing out in front of the television, and while you needed to relax the first night, the second night your spirit may pipe up and start making you feel uneasy. Our spirit selves remind us that we didn’t go through the trouble of being born on Earth to sit on a couch night after night after night. If you watch television every night would put money on the table that you feel you were meant for something more, because you are.

There is nothing wrong with watching television sometimes!  I know there is nothing better for my spirit some nights than to snuggle up with my husband and watch a good movie, but some nights my spirit would rather read a book, play with watercolours, spend quality time with my significant other or kids, make love, go for a walk, post an inspirational quote on instagram, or sit in the back yard and eat a popsicle!

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When you are feeling fearful or anxious it is important that you question the unrest.  Ask yourself what your spirit needs to thrive, and listen to the guidance, feelings, and images that come to mind.  Spend some time in meditation and quietly reflect.

The next time you want to buy something, ask yourself why. This simple question can make you dig deep and figure out what you are really trying to achieve by acquiring something else.

We recently cleaned out our entire house, from the depths of the closets to the cupboards, drawers, and crawlspaces.  We simply asked ourself this one question about everything: Does this give me energy or deplete it?  If something didn’t feel good to, it got thrown in the donation pile and left the house a few hours later.  Make sure your donation pile doesn’t stick around for months.  Take it away immediately and feel the energy in your house soar!

Getting rid of the old creates space for the new without your energy getting lost. There is flow. Life. Beauty. Peace. It opens the door to possibilities you’ve never even considered.  Take your power back from the material objects in your life and start visualizing a life of purpose and happiness.  How can you serve? How can you bring joy to yourself and others? What do you love to do so much that you would do for free?

Feel the anxiety and fear melt away into excitement as soon as you commit to taking action in the direction of your dreams!