How Do I Enjoy My Own Positivity Without Getting Weighed Down By My Parter’s Negativity?

You actually started answering your own question within the rest of your question! Appreciation will get you a long way with respect to this issue. Appreciate the good father that he is. Appreciate the great man he is and the wonderful things he does. When he is stressing and worrying, gently point out the other side of the coin, yet know when it’s time to understand and not explain anything at all. A lot of couples get caught up in thoughts about what they don’t like about their spouses, and nothing good will ever come of that. You’ve got to appreciate what you love about them and find some lighthearted joy along the way, tending to your own vibration as need be. Daydream about what your perfect relationship looks like and ignore the rest.

It is ok to let yourself be happy while someone right next to you is freaking out. A lot of the time we dim our light because we think it will make someone else feel better, but all it does is make us feel terrible and doesn’t help the situation at all anyway. When someone close to you is disconnected from who they really are, stop paying attention to their current behaviour. Instead, go inward and make the connection to your inner being. Feel what your inner being is feeling and follow the guidance you receive. You will either know what to say or know what to do in that moment. Just follow your intuition whether it makes sense to you or not!

You probably have learned to do this already with your kids! You ignore their tantrums and hold the space for them to return to the angelic beings you know they really are. Do the same thing with your husband. If you let him go on and on complaining about something, you’re enabling this behaviour and it will continue. When you find the connection to your inner being, you are connected to the Source of your guidance. If you need a moment to yourself, take it. At least you can explain the reason you are pulling away; you can have an intelligent conversation with your partner that you are usually unable to have with your kids!

My partner and I agree to call each other out on our bullshit.  It doesn’t mean it’s always well received, but we agree to it and we learn from it.  You can also energetically move the energy around any issue by thinking better feeling thoughts with regard to them such as “I love when my partner tells me about the good parts of his day. I love hearing about all of the things that excite him. I love knowing that no matter how bad his day is, he brings the best of himself home to his family. I love how he can make me laugh, etc.” In time you will get better and better with regard to controlling your thoughts.

If you can control your thoughts with respect to your partner for even the smallest amount of time, you will see change. Do your best to tailor your thoughts to something that is already true for you or else it’s not going to help you because you will know deep down it is a lie. Fake it until you make it just doesn’t work for me. Being true to my heart always does.

Use Distance as a Tool

Put some distance between you and him whenever you feel the need. Your intuition will let you know because you’ll have this nagging pit in your stomach that tells you to remove yourself from an uncomfortable situation. Listen to this feeling and let yourself go!

Meditate, take a shower or bath, or go for a run. Listen to your favourite song really, really loud and dance around the kitchen with headphones on. I can’t tell you how many times going for a run has saved my sanity. Run/walk, whatever. Get some fresh air and clear your mind. It’s as easy as saying “Honey, do you mind if I go for a run?” Done. Answers come to me so easily while I am running. I will know what to say to my partner about a certain issue, or I will know how to deal with a certain issue with my kids, or I’ll get the idea to do something I’d never even considered before which solves a problem I didn’t know I even had. It’s incredible what guidance comes when you make t a priority to listen!

Lead By Example.

In time, your partner will see how calm you are and may start doing the same. He would benefit from a hobby he loves that feeds his spirit. I use the example of running because it’s what I love to do to clear my mind. If he can find something that clears his mind, it will do him (and you) a world of good. Because, if you aren’t doing something to bring yourself into alignment with who you really are, you’re grasping at straws and won’t have anything to give anyone else anyway. When you’re not in alignment, worry, fear, and anxiety easily take hold. When you’re in alignment, worry, fear, and anxiety don’t even exist. Love always prevails in the state of alignment.

There is no need to think about your problems when you run/exercise. Just clear your head and listen for your guidance. Your guides know more about you than you do. They also know the shortcut to everything you have ever asked for. I’m not entirely sure we need to think about anything ever again. Just ask to find solutions and listen for the answers to come. Expect them to come.

When you wake up in the morning, before you mentally jump into your to-do list, just lay there and listen for the answers to come. If you are working on your receptivity to your guidance, the fuzzy area between the awake and sleep states is a great time to allow this clarity to wash over you.

Perception is Tricky

We often create problems in our own minds that have no basis in reality. Communication is the key. Have a problem in your relationship? Talk about it. It doesn’t matter if it’s big or small. If it’s dragging you down, it’s worth getting it out in the open. When issues have roots, you’ve got to address them. Just find your alignment and then raise the issue with your partner when you are in a good feeling place about it.

I know a lot of spiritual teachers will tell you to stop looking at a problem and focus on the solution, which is valid for sure, but sometimes you just can’t get your mind off something and not talking about it ends up hurting the relationship. I have had much quicker success in my own life by addressing my issues with honesty and the knowing I have in my heart. It has made my parter and I closer than I ever thought possible.

Go with your own personal guidance in this area. No matter what anyone says, its always best to go with your intuition. What’s best for me may not me best for you. Some issues I can ignore and they work themselves out, while others just keep coming back around. If they keep coming back, it may be time to talk about them.

Permission to Thrive

You need to give yourself permission to thrive no matter what. If it means your partner stays where he is and you outgrow him, so be it. You have to follow your truth and you can’t expect everyone to come with you. I don’t think we are meant to have the same partner for life. I think the right partners come in at the right time. It doesn’t mean that you can’t have the same partner for life, but it means that you have to accept that you will have periods of exponential growth that occur at different times. A friend told me that the trick to staying together long-term is “we never fell out of love with each other at the same time.”

Connect to your inner being. Follow your heart. Speak your truth. Take care of yourself. Know that everything is always working out for you. And look for the evidence of it all day, every day.

xo Amy

 

Is Your Story Serving You?

My story is inspiring. It’s incredible. And yet as inspiring and uplifting as my story is, it never feels good to talk about it. To be completely honest, looking back at it in any capacity at all doesn’t feel good!

As amazing as your story may be, looking back at it brings the past into the present moment. As uplifting as the message is, bringing any pain into the present moment just doesn’t feel good. When you claim the past in the present, you are muddying up the perfection that is now. It feels so good to be in the now, where anything and everything is possible.

When you breathe deeply and claim “I am here now in the present moment,” you open space in your physical body to flow Source energy. “I am Source in the present moment” is even more powerful. You are spirit flowing through a physical body. You cannot NOT be connected to Source. You are Source. That will never change.

Obviously, you can do as you wish. I just want you to bring your attention to how you feel when you go into detail about things that are not working in your life. How does it make you feel? Perhaps you would feel better if you focused on the solution to what is not working? Once you have felt the pain of a situation, it’s time to focus on feeling better. You know what you don’t want, so what do you want?

People are going to do what they’re going to do and there is nothing you can do to change it. But you can change your reaction to it and you can change what you think about. When I’m hurting for whatever reason, I choose to fantasize about things that I really want to feel. You can start anywhere and get a pretty good rampage of appreciation going with just a little bit of focus and the intention to feel better.

Here’s an example of my mental game when I was at the lowest point in my life:

“I know that I’m going to be happy. When I am on the other side of this, it’s going to feel really good. I am so lucky to have my boys. I am so lucky that they chose me to be their mom! They are so precious and beautiful inside and out. I love that when I hug them, I can easily connect to Source energy. I know that there is so much more for me. I love knowing that I can connect to this Source whenever I choose. I love knowing that everything is always working out for me, even though I can’t see it yet. I know that there is so much working out for me right now that I can’t see! How amazing is it to know that we are truly loved regardless of what other humans are saying and doing? I love that I can feel whole and complete all on my own. How amazing is it that I have so much to look forward to in this life? I know that I created this and I take full responsibility for myself. It is so empowering to know that I create my own reality!”

I have no idea what caused me to catapult into this knowing, but I knew. I opened up to spirit so intensely and so easily. I imagine it is because I was never that far away from it, and my desire to feel good had never been stronger in that moment of pain. I was asking, they were responding, and in my desire to feel better I let it in.

Negative thinking is just a habit, and a habit can be changed – especially when you recognize what is going on at an energetic level. If thoughts are energy, and energy is everything in this vibrational Universe, your thoughts are creating your reality. The things you say are creating your reality. The frequency you hold is creating your reality.

Each moment is a new opportunity to create a different reality from the one you are currently in. The present moment is all you have. It is the point of creation. So, what do you want to do with it? Do you want to complain? Do you want to talk about what people have done in the past to hurt you? Do you want to yell at your kids?

Or, do you want to appreciate? Do you want to love? Do you want excitement? Do you want to open your heart? Do you want to feel good? Do you want to create something new?

I want to love. I want to open my heart. I want to live my life flowing Source energy. I want to feel connected to all that is. I want to thrive. I want my sons to thrive. I want to be incredibly blissfully happy. I want to have a relationship with my partner that is full of passion. I want to tap into my inner being’s perspective and to live a life full of precious  gifts – moments that I couldn’t plan if I tried from my human perspective. I want to trust that everything is always working out for me. I want to know that everything is always really ok. I want to live life knowing that there is never any risk.

Now, if we bring all of those wants into this feeling moment, it would sound something like this:

I love loving. I love living my life with an open heart. I love feeling Source energy flow through me. I love being connected to all that is. I love thriving in this time space reality. I love that my children are thriving and that I am incredibly blissfully happy. I love that my relationship is full of passion and love. I love those moments when I am at one with my inner being’s perspective, when my heart is glowing with pure love and joy, and I love seeing the manifestations of my vibration. I trust that everything is always working out for me. I love knowing that there is no risk. I love knowing that there is nothing to fear. All is well.

xo Amy

Q&A: How Do I Stop Feeling Like I Can Never Catch Up?

Busyness is an epidemic in our society. Everyone is so busy doing that they’re missing the point of being in the moment. The key to taking control of your crazy life, just like anything else, lies in your heart.

Wherever you are, you can get to where you want to be. It helps if you have a specific goal in mind but it’s not necessary. Simply knowing what you want to feel is good enough. For instance, you may know that you want to be a painter, so you paint when you feel the inspiration. If you don’t have “time” – make time. Schedule it in. If you don’t know what is it you are looking for, you can appreciate the feeling of how you want to feel. For instance, you can feel what it wold feel like to have unlimited time, ease, love, connection, and excitement.

All of this is going to come together via the Law of Attraction. Like attracts like. The vibration you put out is the one you receive. Things are always in a state of change. Nothing ever stays the same. But, you may not notice the change because things are changing to more of the same and more of the same and more of the same.

“Work is hard.” “I hate my job” “I never have enough time” etc. are thoughts that are going to change to more and more of the same. If you can practice feeling appreciation and joy in your daily experience, it will raise your vibration enough so that as time passes, you will see palpable change. Happier people will enter into your experience. There will be more laughing and more spontaneity. In general, you will feel more excitement in your life.

Over time, you will begin to notice how your thoughts create your reality. And in greater time, you will see just how powerful of a co-creator you really are. Eventually you will come to know that you can be, do, or have anything you desire because your life experience will show you time and time again that you get what you think about whether you want it or not.

The easiest way to get the momentum rolling in the right direction is to take time every single morning to make sure you get out of bed with the right mindset. If you wake up with a  debilitating thought, take the time to think of a better feeling thought on that subject, or choose another subject all together. I recommend leaving your thoughts on any subject in a better feeling place because it is incredibly empowering to know that you are in charge of your thoughts and that they are not in charge of you. Plus, it feels better!

Tips for improving your current job:

  1. Set the intention when you go to bed to wake up in a good mood, full of energy and enthusiasm for your job in the morning. Intention is everything. Most people pre-pave their days full of dislike for their jobs. This is your chance to choose your own adventure the day before.
  2. If you wake up in dread with the thought of going to work, wake up 45 minutes earlier and go for a quick run. Movement of the body is important to move energy, so if you can swing it, get yourself moving!
  3. If working out sounds impossible, (I can literally hear you groaning) choose any thought about your job that you really like. Appreciate how good that thought feels and appreciate the people who make your job fun.
  4. Meditate. Set your alarm for 15-20 minutes and sit with the intention to simply be. Breathe deeply and feel for the love that is omnipresent. Focus on your heart chakra and let in the love.
  5. Appreciate all day long. Especially when you notice negative thoughts. Even people you have always perceived as completely awful will change right before your eyes if you only see the good in them and find things to appreciate. And when a compliment for someone pops into your head, share it! You are an uplifter at heart!

And last but not least, take time for yourself. Put yourself first. It’s not selfish to do what you want to do. It’s IMPERATIVE to being happy. Take care of yourself and do what makes you happy. If you don’t do this, you won’t have any energy to give anyone else anyway. This means saying NO to a lot of thing you are currently saying YES to and regretting. If it’s not a HELL YES it’s a HELL NO. Remember this one thing alone and I guarantee you will catch up and feel an immediate increase of joy in your daily life!

The happier you are, the more tapped into your spirit you will be, and the easier it will be for you to hear the inspiring thoughts your spirit is constantly sharing with you. This is why meditation is so important. It is an open invitation to spirit. When you quiet your mind, you are better able to hear your guidance. Spiritual guidance is not reserved for psychics and mediums. If you are a human on Earth, you have spiritual guidance because the “spirit you” thought the “physical you” into being. And that same energy that created you is flowing through you now, creating with your thoughts and your overall vibration. The frequency you emit is what the law of attraction responds to in each and every waking moment.

Pay attention to that little voice in your head. Most thoughts that feel really, really good to you are actually guidance from spirit. Spirit knows exactly what you want and how to get it to you in the easiest of ways, but often we ignore these amazing thoughts and counter them with thoughts like “I can’t do that”. Yes, you can. If you received and inspiring thought, you can do it. Think about it some more and get really excited about it. You can be, do, or have anything you desire. All you have to do is align with your spirit on a daily basis and let it all in. You don’t even need to think anymore. You just have to be happy and let the law of attraction and spirit show you the way!

Guidance is Everywhere. Listen.

I took my 3 young boys to the the dentist today, taking a bullet that I didn’t want to take because sometimes I have to be something we call an “adult”. I don’t feel like an adult. Does anyone? Every few weeks I have a moment where I think “how do I have 3 kids?!” One day you have no kids and the next you’re entire world is upside down and ruled by a 7lb scream machine. There’s no test. There should be a test!

When I went to the school to pick up my 2 oldest for lunch before the dentist, I had a quick chat with another mother. A mother that I actually met at an airport in Barbados I might add. We ended up renting in the same condo building down there. Then a few days after we returned home, I saw her walking down my street. Apparently we never had the “where are you from?” conversation. The Universe amazes me with its little games every single day.

She told me that she’s been picking up her kids for lunch for years. And I told her that this is the second time I’ve ever done it. I have no problem telling my children that they’re going to eat lunch in the school cafeteria with the rest of the kids. It’s good for me, and what’s good for me is good for them. If I had to pick them up every single day I would be a mess! No just no. Not happening.

She told me that when it gets cold it’s really hard to have to pick them up for lunch. So I suggested that when it gets cold she should tell them that it’s time for them to stay for lunch. I wanted to open up the space for her to make her own decision, but let her know that if it’s making her unhappy in any way, she should allow herself the freedom to do what feels better. Something prompted me to sit beside her. Spirit is always guiding us. I was her flashing red light of guidance with a message she was ready to hear. But, we have to take action on our guidance. I say what I feel inspired to say, and I don’t take it personally when people don’t hear what I say, but the pull to sit beside her was so strong and the conversation guided itself. Pure inspiration: in spirit.

guidance

Leaving my kids at school for lunch time gives them time to play, and me and extra hour and a half of work each day. They play outside for 30 minutes before they eat. If I picked them up they’d miss out on valuable exercise and fun! Also, it makes the times I DO pick them up extra special. The last time I picked up Oscar for lunch, we went on a little date to the French Restaurant behind our house. He was so excited, and so was I. It was valuable 1 on 1 time that we rarely get and I’m excited to do it again 🙂

Talking with this mother for a few minutes made me reevaluate my entire life. Is it making you reevaluate your own? Is there anything you’re doing now that you don’t want to do? Is there any way to shift the responsibility in any way to give yourself more freedom and relief? I even called my Cable/Internet provider and changed my plan to save me $45 a month because I don’t want to pay for a phone line we don’t use and channels we don’t watch. That’s $540 a year!

If there is anything that has been on your mind lately that you want to change, do it now. It’s so much less painful when you listen to your guidance and follow through with action than if you let it eat away at your soul for the next weeks, months, and years. Just as I wrote that, I got the feeling that I need to go to the dentist. That is my guidance system chiming in with something that needs to be done. I’ve been saying for way too long that I need to go, so in the spirit of this message (and the honouring of spirit’s message) I will take my own advice and make an appointment tomorrow!

What thoughts and feelings are popping into your head? What do you need to change? What needs completion? What “adulting” have you been putting off? Listen to those thoughts and feelings, that guidance, and TAKE ACTION!

 

How to Save Yourself from Earth’s Current Insanity.

The energy on this planet right now is insane. If you watched the Second Presidential Debate, you’ll know exactly what I mean.  And if you didn’t, you’re better off. I watched about 10 minutes of it before I had to run away and save myself and I’ve spent countless hours thinking about it since…is this really happening? Have we not learned anything? How does this level of ignorance still exist? Thankfully I finally listened to my guidance and went upstairs to read. Phew.

If you’ve been feeling OFF lately, I want you to know that you are not the problem. There are crazy energies going around and being the energetic, vibrational beings you are, you’re likely feeling it. I was feeling completely off centre until I followed my guidance to start running again, and let me tell you, the energy change is just what I needed.

Instead of feeling insanely spacey, reactive, and angry, I am feeling more grounded and calm. And even when something does get the best of me (having 3 boys ages 2 to 5 will do it) I’m able to return to centre fairly quickly and let go of whatever unhinged me. I even went for an 8k run before a hot yoga class yesterday, and my yoga experience was incredible because of it. It most definitely enhanced my ability to explore my edge. I was a damn good tree yesterday.

If you’ve been feeling unusually rocky and angry lately, I highly recommend getting outside and soothing your spirit with nature. If you are able to run I encourage you to get out there and run until you can’t run anymore. Even if you have to run for 30 seconds and walk for 2 minutes to recover, get out there and do it. No excuses!

If you’re repelled by the idea get ready for a little tough love: You get out of life what you put in, and if you’re not willing to stretch your comfort zone even a little bit, you’ve got to start thinking about your priorities. Do you want to feel better? Do you want to be happier? Do you want to stop snapping at your family members? (Food for thought: Does your family get the best of you or the worst of you?) Do you want to experience more joy in your life? Do you want to feel more relaxed? Do you want to stop reacting to every little stimuli that crosses your path? Run. Walk. Anything. Just Do it as Nike says. You’ll congratulate yourself later I promise.

If something is holding you back from getting exercise, I encourage you to do a little pre-paving and psych yourself up for the amazing feelings that running will bring. I do this little exercise the second I get the inspiration to run. Think about how good it’s going to feel to have all of that oxygen running through your body. Think of how good it’s going to feel to snap your spirit back into your body. That is essentially what grounding is to me anyway – to be fully one with who you really are – to minimize the gap between physical you and non-physical you (your Higher Self or inner being). Think about that rush of endorphins you will get as you complete your run, that sense of accomplishment, that high 5 you’re going to give yourself at the end. Think about how good your jeans are going to feel after! I don’t run to lose weight but the physical changes of regular exercise certainly are a bonus!

And it’s not only running that can centre you, though it is one of my favourite go-to ways to beat the bad energy out of my body. Doing anything that excites your spirit will help. Excitement lights up our spiritual path. Do whatever it is that makes you the most YOU.

What puts the spark in your eye? Is it painting? Reading a good book? Meeting a good friend for coffee? Eating pizza? Do that. Do all of it. But don’t eat pizza because you’re unhappy and you’re trying to fill a void. Eat pizza because you fucking LOVE to eat pizza and it’s going to make a good time even better. Energy matters. The energy you eat your food with matters. The energy you do anything with matters.

Go for a run to get yourself out of a rut, but don’t eat pizza from that vantage point. Only eat pizza when you feel good, ok? There are no rules, but there’s one for you anyway. It’s more of a suggestion than a rule. Ok, ok, you are the creator of your own reality, so you can eat pizza whenever you want. But don’t say I didn’t warn you. Listen to that little voice in your head and go from there ;).

Basically happiness comes down to this: Do what makes you feel good. Think thoughts that feel good. Spend time with people who you enjoy spending time with. Watch TV programs that feel good. (I watched season 1 of Narcos for instance and thought it was amazing. By the time season 2 was released I just couldn’t do it. I hated the dude and that did not feel good so that was that. I’m completely happy leaving the series incomplete for the sake of my happiness. It feels so good!)

FEEL into everything you do! We receive guidance through our feelings. Those gut feelings that you have – the thoughts that pop into your head when you ask yourself a question? Listen. To. Them. The more you do, the easier it will become to listen to your guidance in the future. It’s working out your intuitive muscles so to speak.

feelings

For example: “Do you want to order pizza?” “Umm I’m not really hungry, but yeah ok if you want to I’ll have some.” The correct response is no with that energy!!!! Say “No I don’t want any, thank you.” LISTEN to your GUT!!! Do not eat pizza because you have FOMO: Fear of missing out. If you have FOMO about anything, feel into it and ask yourself what that’s all about.

Example 2: “Do you want to order pizza?” “YES!!! OMIGOD YES I WAS THINKING THE EXACT SAME THING!!!” What are you waiting for – order the pizza!!!!

Understand? Good.

Apparently this post is really about pizza and running… I hope I cleared some things up for you with that little rant. You are powerful. You are worthy. You are doing a good job. Centre yourself and listen to your guidance. You are never wrong because is ever done. Make a decision. Listen to your guidance about it, and recalculate. Make another decision. Listen to guidance, etc. Follow your dreams and don’t let anyone talk you out of them! Or into pizza when you don’t want any.

ox Amy

 

How to Lose Weight the Easy Way

They’re everywhere this time of year: Guilt, self-hatred, loathing, disgust, comparison, anorexia, bulimia, girls starving themselves, boys starving themselves, bingeing, more self-hatred, more disgust, more comparison, and more loathing.

What if, we just stopped? What if we could love ourselves just as we are? What if we could focus on all that we are rather than all we are not? What if we are perfect right now, right in this moment?

Let me tell you something: You are perfect.

And, you are not your body. You are the spirit inside the body. You can think of your body as a rental. It’s where you live right now, but it is not who you are. When you can love the spirit who resides in that body of yours, you can start to look past its “clothing” and see who you really are. So, body aside, who are you?

rosequartz

Who you really are is a being of light and love. You are eternal. You are going about this world in a slight state of amnesia. You purposely chose this lifetime to learn for the advancement of your soul. Your inner being, that part of you that is still in spirit form, is nudging and guiding you constantly to help you remember who you are.  All you have to do is listen to that little voice in your head that you try to ignore.

Your inner being is that voice that wants to quit your job and work with horses. It’s that feeling you get when you get all warm and fuzzy and think about your deepest dreams. Your inner being wants to kiss more, cuddle more, visit with friends more, and eat and drink foods that taste amazing. It wants to go for long walks, have soul inspiring conversations, and have meaningful mind-blowing sex. It wants you to follow those sparks of inspiration that you ignore out of fear.

When you’re doing things that make you happy, you’re more aligned with who you really are. When you are feeling sadness, guilt, or fear, you are thinking or doing something that your inner being doesn’t agree with. When you are standing in front of the mirror criticizing your body, you feel bad. You feel bad because your inner being disagrees with you in that moment. Your inner being sees the perfection that you are. When you are comparing yourself to others, thinking you are fat and they are perfect, you feel bad. Once again, your inner being disagrees.  It knows that your body is not who you are, and it knows that you are perfect.

When you feel guilty, your inner being feels love. When you feel fat, your inner being feels love. When you feel disgusted, your inner being feels love. When you hate yourself, your inner being feels love. Do you see a pattern yet?

Your inner being loves you unconditionally. The more you can love yourself unconditionally, the more in alignment you will be with your spirit, and the happier you will become. And though self-love is probably the best thing in the whole entire world, an amazing side effect occurs when you love yourself unconditionally:

You lose weight.

When you love yourself, you will take care of yourself. Foods that used to taste good won’t taste good anymore. You’ll spend long hours doing something you love and you’ll forget all about food. Have you ever been doing something that you were so passionate about that you forgot to eat? Or, you’ll go out with friends and eat anything and everything you want and you won’t stress about it! The freedom you will feel!

We overeat because there is something missing in our lives. We’re bored. We’re looking for the next best thing to love or the next person who can give us love and attention because we’re starving for it. We are so starved for love and affection because we’ve been withholding it from ourselves for so long. We’ve neglected our inner being. We’ve stuffed food down our throats to appease that uneasy feeling inside, but not listening to that feeling inside is why we’re feeling uneasy in the first place! And then society shames us for being fat and so we shame ourselves because we’ve learned that’s what we’re supposed to do.

Your inner being is trying to get your attention. That uneasiness you feel can only be calmed one way, and that is by listening to it and changing course. If thinking a certain thought feels bad, choose another thought. Choose loving thoughts about your body and see your body change. Send your body love, and it will respond by loving you back. Stop being so hard on yourself and shift the momentum in a loving direction. Take your power back from society and start loving the spirit you are, just as your inner being does: unconditionally.

Action steps:

Tonight when you go to bed, list all of the reasons why you love yourself. What went really well today? What were your successes?

Next, appreciate your body for all that it does for you. Thank your lungs for breathing, and your feet for carrying you through the day. Thank your knees for supporting you and your hands and arms for the ability to hug others. Thank your eyes for seeing and your tongue for tasting. Touch your body and thank it for being your home in this lifetime. Touch your breasts and acknowledge their beauty. Thank them for feeding your babies and send them love. Send all of your body parts love. They are beautiful. You are beautiful – just the way you are.

 

The Joy of Being Alone.

Right now my house is quiet. Blissfully quiet. The kids have all been delivered to their respective schools, my hubby is working at Starbucks…on his laptop, and I have about 5 places I need to be right now and a huge project I need to finish by tomorrow. So naturally I don’t want to do anything at all right now but sit in the glorious silence that surrounds me. And once again, the silence brought my fingers to this keyboard, and here we are.

The silence is where I can be wholly me, unaltered by others’ energy fields, their expectations, their desires, their needs, their incessant whining about needing to be fed on a consistent basis. What’s that all about anyway?

Silence is golden. And it’s something you don’t fully realize until it becomes really really hard to obtain. It wasn’t until we had 3 kids and 2 dogs running around that we understood just how golden silence really is. It’s funny that we need the contrast of what we don’t want to finally understand what we do want. If you are constantly running around like a headless chicken, it’s high time you throw a cushion on the floor and take a seat.

I didn’t understand just how unhappy I had been until I started to get glimpses of happiness. You can spend your whole life in a downward spiral of gloom and doom  thinking it’s normal. And while it may indeed be normal, it’s not what you are meant to live.

Are you smiling right now? You should be. Are you excited when you wake up in the morning or do you have an adult temper tantrum in your head when you open your eyes? Are you happy to be alive, happy to make choices every day about which direction you want your life to go? Are you crying happy tears right now, or sad ones?

Let me ask you this: When was the last time you laughed so hard for so long that you just couldn’t stop. And when you looked at someone, they started laughing too, just because you were laughing, and when you think about that moment now, you laugh about it still! Was it yesterday, or was it when you were a child?

Without knowing it, we learn how to be adults from our parents. Children see and hear everything, even the things that adults wish they could desperately hide from them, because the loudest things we hear aren’t being said, they’re being felt. When my marriage fell apart my kids saw it, they heard it, and they felt it. I knew it, and I did my best to hold it together. I don’t know if I did it for them or for me, but I knew that being strong was the only choice worth making.

Choosing fear was not an option. I had chosen fear my entire life, and look where it had gotten me. So I chose differently. I chose love. And it was the best choice I have ever made in my entire life. I decided to love everyone and everything, but most of all, I finally gave myself permission to love myself.

Among other things, meditation saved me. I believed in angels and guides already, so I decided to go all in and entertain the whole God idea. I sat in silence and prayed. I prayed for strength and courage and guidance and infinite love and support. I prayed to all of the Archangels I could name to enter into my life and help me transform into this person I knew I could be. I prayed to Archangel Raphael, Uriel, Gabriel, Chamuel, Michael, Remiel, Raziel, Zadkiel, Jophiel, Sandalphon, Metatron and more. I brought them into the car with me, into the shower, everywhere. I stopped listening to music. I stopped watching television. My perspective had totally shifted and I wanted one thing more than anything in the entire world: I wanted to stop being numb and start directing my life. I wanted to take my power back and be blissfully happy.

For the first time in my life I understood that it was my job to make myself happy – no one else’s. I finally understood just how much I had given my power away throughout the years. I gave it away all over the place. I gave it to anyone who did anything better than me. I gave it to anyone who did anything at all because I assumed they would do it better than me. And all the while, this really awesome spirit inside of me was suffocating, willing me to step up and step into my power, but it was too scary to be strong, so I kept choosing fear.

This seems like the perfect time to introduce my favourite quote. And while Elanor is granted having said this, it seems to be a paraphrase of a conversation she once had. Either way, I wish I could have coffee with her sometime:

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Why would I keep choosing fear? The best answer I have for this question is that a fear response on this level is learned. Learning not to touch a hot stove was something I could learn all on my own. It’s instinctual. But learning to be scared to talk on the telephone is not. Mostly I learned how to be scared from my mother, and because I operated at the vibration of fear, it was the only signal my antennae picked up. I was so fearful that I was attracting fearful people to my experience. I could only see the fearful outcomes of situations because I never entertained the idea that maybe I could be strong.

Over time I had chosen fear so often that it was an ingrained response. My fear neurons had created a super highway in my brain and there was no off ramp.

Two years ago, I sat down with a psychic medium who told me that I hadn’t laughed in 3 years. At first I was defensive. But a split second later I knew she was right. 3 YEARS! That is a long time to be unhappy. Thank God I was on a quest to be happy. It was my happiness quest that brought me to her in the first place. She told me that I too had gifts. She told me that I have the power to sit on her side of the table, and I knew she was right. The more I sit in silence, the more I am able to tap into them.

You too have powerful gifts. The best way I know to access them is to find joy in silence. Get to know yourself intimately by carving out a few minutes to enjoy your own company. Get to know the spirit within that is wanting so very badly to be heard.

Don’t use an excuse. Don’t do that. Don’t say that you don’t have time. Make time. Instead of laying down immediately when you go to bed, sit up. Sit on your bed, prop yourself up with pillows, and breathe. It’s that easy. You’re meditating. Turn off the radio in your car. Close your eyes at red lights and take a few deep breaths until the guy behind you honks to tell you your time is up!

Take a break from social media. That should free up a few hours ;). If there is a show you’re really excited to watch, watch it! Enjoy it, and be happy! But if you’re mindlessly flipping through television stations, turn it off and hang out with your spirit. It’s time well spent. Take your power back and be happy, wild, and free!

8 Reasons You Are Unhappy With Your Body and What to do About it

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I know how you feel. You look at your body in the mirror and instantly feel deflated. You don’t know how you’re going to get to the body of your dreams from where you are. You seem to gain weight just be looking at food, and you have no idea what you are doing wrong! We’ve all been there, but there is a way out, and the way out may surprise you!

Here are 8 reasons why you may be stuck, and what you can do about it right now.

 1. You tend to focus on what you don’t want.

The fastest way to get what you don’t want is by focusing on what you don’t want. So how do you change things around? Focus on what you DO want. Focus all of your energy on everything you’re doing right, not what you are doing wrong. Change your thoughts, and you change your life.

2. You’re not happy, period.

Happiness is a package deal. When one thing goes wrong, it seems to create a domino effect and takes your whole life with it. This is in line with #1, and you may see a theme here, because it’s all tied in together. If you can focus on what is going right in your life, the domino effect will kick in and you will gain momentum in all other areas of your life. Even if 9 out of 10 things in your life are going wrong, your attention to what is going right can turn everything around.

3.  You’re too serious.

Each morning when you wake up, set the intention to be happy. Make the decision to be happy anyway, regardless of what is happening around you. Make it your intention to have fun no matter what. Laugh more, worry less. If you catch yourself worrying about something, distract yourself! Watch a funny youtube video. Or learn something new. Go to your happy place and soak up the sunshine waiting for you there.

4. You focus on the problem when you should focus on the solution.

Ta-Da! Again, we want to steer the car forward, not backward. Focus on the problem just long enough to see what direction you want the solution to go. Use the contrast of what you don’t want to create the desire for what you do want, and take it from there. If you want a fit body, ask yourself how you can create it instead of asking why you can’t do it. Create an empowering environment, like easy access to the gym or hot yoga, and buy only health promoting foods. Have healthy snacks on hand at all times!

5. You spend more time doing than being.

There are so many distractions in our society! If you take a break and head to facebook, you’ll probably end up feeling worse rather than refreshed. If you can resist the facebook/instagram/pinterest urge and find 5 minutes a day to sit quietly and go within, you can tap into guidance that is not available to you when you’re too busy doing. If you can find 15 minutes in your day, it’s even better. Meditation is your personal spiritual goldmine. Your angels and guides are waiting patiently to help you, so quiet your mind and see what guidance is waiting for you there.

6. You’re not asking the right questions.

During your quiet time, ask yourself questions and wait for the answer. Ask things like “What is my favourite thing to do? What do I enjoy about my job? If I could delegate some work, what would I be happy to get off my plate?” You may be surprised at the answers that come up. Ask any and every question that pops into your head. You may want to have a pen and paper beside you in case you want to write something down. Use this newfound awareness to create the life you desire.

7. You’re trying to do everything yourself.

This is something you may resist, but if you can put your ego aside for a moment, everything will get easier if you do just this one thing. Here it is: Ask God to help you see the situation differently; Ask to see through the eyes of God. You are perfect as you are. You are loved unconditionally. All of the obsessing we do about our bodies that makes us feel terrible is because we are thinking thoughts that God does not have about us. If you can let go of physical perfection and really know that you are already a perfect spiritual being, you will be in alignment with spiritual truth. I asked God for help and what I got was “You are not your body.” It hit me like a brick in the face. Our spirit is eternal. Our bodies are not who we are. Our body is our temporary home and they are nothing without the spirit. When we “fix” the body we are ignoring our spirit. This is why people can spend thousands of dollars perfecting their bodies and still feel unsatisfied. The body isn’t the problem, it’s the spirit that is undernourished. Feed your spirit and your body will follow the domino effect.

8. You don’t love yourself.

We all have those I hate my body moments. Each time it comes up, change your thoughts to love. Focus on everything you love about yourself each and every day. Every time you look in the mirror, tell yourself how proud you are and how amazing you are. Love other peoples’ bodies. Bless them instead of judging them. Ask God to turn your judgements into love. This is hard. It’s hard to stop judging. I probably ask God to change my thoughts hundreds of times each day. “How can I see this person with love? What am I missing?” Ask the questions and you’ll get answers. Lasting change begins with your mind.

PRACTICE (1)

You may have noticed that a lot of this has nothing to do with your body! That’s because by focusing on the problem, you get more of the problem! The moment I decided to stop worrying about my body and started focusing on what I loved to do in my life, my body stopped being a problem. I started loving it unconditionally, and it changed.

Here is an example of what I say to myself. You can use this as a template to make it fit in line with your beliefs. The Universe responds to what you mean, not what you say, so make sure you are being authentically you:

“Thank you, body, for being my home on planet earth. Thank you for supporting my daily activities like hockey and hot yoga. Thank you for being so easy to change. I love that I can choose to be active and that I can change my body through my desire to be fit and healthy.

Thank you God for helping me to choose healthy foods to eat, and for blessing me with love each and every day. Thank you for helping me to choose thoughts of love and for answering my prayers to see things differently when I am having difficulty seeing with love.

There is nothing more important to me than being happy, so thank you for the contrast I feel each and every day; I know there is guidance within my negative emotions. It is what illuminates the path before me. It lets me know when I am not being loving to myself or another, and helps me to choose love.”

If you do the work necessary to put a smile on your face, everything else will fall into place. Every problem is due to a lack of love. So the solution is infusing love into everyone and everything. If you have a problem with your spouse, heal it with love. If you have a problem with your body, heal it with love. If you have a problem with your child, heal it with love. You can apply this to anything! If you have a problem with your cell phone, see the situation differently and be grateful that you have one in the first place! See all things with love and watch your world transform before your eyes.