8 Reasons You Are Unhappy With Your Body and What to do About it

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I know how you feel. You look at your body in the mirror and instantly feel deflated. You don’t know how you’re going to get to the body of your dreams from where you are. You seem to gain weight just be looking at food, and you have no idea what you are doing wrong! We’ve all been there, but there is a way out, and the way out may surprise you!

Here are 8 reasons why you may be stuck, and what you can do about it right now.

 1. You tend to focus on what you don’t want.

The fastest way to get what you don’t want is by focusing on what you don’t want. So how do you change things around? Focus on what you DO want. Focus all of your energy on everything you’re doing right, not what you are doing wrong. Change your thoughts, and you change your life.

2. You’re not happy, period.

Happiness is a package deal. When one thing goes wrong, it seems to create a domino effect and takes your whole life with it. This is in line with #1, and you may see a theme here, because it’s all tied in together. If you can focus on what is going right in your life, the domino effect will kick in and you will gain momentum in all other areas of your life. Even if 9 out of 10 things in your life are going wrong, your attention to what is going right can turn everything around.

3.  You’re too serious.

Each morning when you wake up, set the intention to be happy. Make the decision to be happy anyway, regardless of what is happening around you. Make it your intention to have fun no matter what. Laugh more, worry less. If you catch yourself worrying about something, distract yourself! Watch a funny youtube video. Or learn something new. Go to your happy place and soak up the sunshine waiting for you there.

4. You focus on the problem when you should focus on the solution.

Ta-Da! Again, we want to steer the car forward, not backward. Focus on the problem just long enough to see what direction you want the solution to go. Use the contrast of what you don’t want to create the desire for what you do want, and take it from there. If you want a fit body, ask yourself how you can create it instead of asking why you can’t do it. Create an empowering environment, like easy access to the gym or hot yoga, and buy only health promoting foods. Have healthy snacks on hand at all times!

5. You spend more time doing than being.

There are so many distractions in our society! If you take a break and head to facebook, you’ll probably end up feeling worse rather than refreshed. If you can resist the facebook/instagram/pinterest urge and find 5 minutes a day to sit quietly and go within, you can tap into guidance that is not available to you when you’re too busy doing. If you can find 15 minutes in your day, it’s even better. Meditation is your personal spiritual goldmine. Your angels and guides are waiting patiently to help you, so quiet your mind and see what guidance is waiting for you there.

6. You’re not asking the right questions.

During your quiet time, ask yourself questions and wait for the answer. Ask things like “What is my favourite thing to do? What do I enjoy about my job? If I could delegate some work, what would I be happy to get off my plate?” You may be surprised at the answers that come up. Ask any and every question that pops into your head. You may want to have a pen and paper beside you in case you want to write something down. Use this newfound awareness to create the life you desire.

7. You’re trying to do everything yourself.

This is something you may resist, but if you can put your ego aside for a moment, everything will get easier if you do just this one thing. Here it is: Ask God to help you see the situation differently; Ask to see through the eyes of God. You are perfect as you are. You are loved unconditionally. All of the obsessing we do about our bodies that makes us feel terrible is because we are thinking thoughts that God does not have about us. If you can let go of physical perfection and really know that you are already a perfect spiritual being, you will be in alignment with spiritual truth. I asked God for help and what I got was “You are not your body.” It hit me like a brick in the face. Our spirit is eternal. Our bodies are not who we are. Our body is our temporary home and they are nothing without the spirit. When we “fix” the body we are ignoring our spirit. This is why people can spend thousands of dollars perfecting their bodies and still feel unsatisfied. The body isn’t the problem, it’s the spirit that is undernourished. Feed your spirit and your body will follow the domino effect.

8. You don’t love yourself.

We all have those I hate my body moments. Each time it comes up, change your thoughts to love. Focus on everything you love about yourself each and every day. Every time you look in the mirror, tell yourself how proud you are and how amazing you are. Love other peoples’ bodies. Bless them instead of judging them. Ask God to turn your judgements into love. This is hard. It’s hard to stop judging. I probably ask God to change my thoughts hundreds of times each day. “How can I see this person with love? What am I missing?” Ask the questions and you’ll get answers. Lasting change begins with your mind.

PRACTICE (1)

You may have noticed that a lot of this has nothing to do with your body! That’s because by focusing on the problem, you get more of the problem! The moment I decided to stop worrying about my body and started focusing on what I loved to do in my life, my body stopped being a problem. I started loving it unconditionally, and it changed.

Here is an example of what I say to myself. You can use this as a template to make it fit in line with your beliefs. The Universe responds to what you mean, not what you say, so make sure you are being authentically you:

“Thank you, body, for being my home on planet earth. Thank you for supporting my daily activities like hockey and hot yoga. Thank you for being so easy to change. I love that I can choose to be active and that I can change my body through my desire to be fit and healthy.

Thank you God for helping me to choose healthy foods to eat, and for blessing me with love each and every day. Thank you for helping me to choose thoughts of love and for answering my prayers to see things differently when I am having difficulty seeing with love.

There is nothing more important to me than being happy, so thank you for the contrast I feel each and every day; I know there is guidance within my negative emotions. It is what illuminates the path before me. It lets me know when I am not being loving to myself or another, and helps me to choose love.”

If you do the work necessary to put a smile on your face, everything else will fall into place. Every problem is due to a lack of love. So the solution is infusing love into everyone and everything. If you have a problem with your spouse, heal it with love. If you have a problem with your body, heal it with love. If you have a problem with your child, heal it with love. You can apply this to anything! If you have a problem with your cell phone, see the situation differently and be grateful that you have one in the first place! See all things with love and watch your world transform before your eyes.

How To Find True Love

Have you ever realized just how beautifully life flows when you are in love? Being in love is the best feeling in the world. It’s magical. It’s unbelievable. Ridiculous. It’s a feeling that I cannot live without in this sometimes seemingly harsh human world.

When you really think about it, all you ever have is now, so you might as well enjoy it. This is it. How you are feeling at this moment is your magnet. That which is like unto itself is drawn, says Abraham and the Law of Attraction. Our thoughts create our experience. Why not think in love?

Your reality is yours and yours alone. There is no collective reality. We all have complete childhoods and life events that shape who we are. We learn good habits and bad habits and everything in between. It is our history that predisposes our thoughts to our current reality.

Until one day it doesn’t. One day we wake up. We step into our power and we are ready to take responsibility for our thoughts, our actions, and our lives. We get off the hamster wheel and realize just how amazing we are. We realize how amazing the world is. We realize how amazing the Universe is, and that the energy we have within us has the power to create worlds.

We realize that life is really, really great. We open our hearts to anyone and everyone and bleed kindness all around. There is nothing that we won’t tear down within us to recreate ourselves in this new vision of all encompassing love. We realize that we’ve been holding ourselves back all this time. Our unhappiness wasn’t caused by anything but our own fear. And all in one defining moment we realize that we can burst straight through fear’s door, broken hearted and all, fully capable and ready to align with that which we truly are: the magnificent being that God created us to be.

2015-08-22 18.37.57And looking back, it really is funny. We had the power within us the entire time, and we just didn’t know it. And life on the other side of heartbreak is beautiful. It’s inspiring. It’s more than you can even imagine. When you find your true love has been within you, it is you, you realize that you can never be alone again.

True love is yours the moment you step into your power. And you don’t even need to be heartbroken. You just have to entertain the idea that you are worthy. You are loved. And everything is always, always working out for you.

Today, love is my invisibility cloak. I try to wear it everywhere. When I wrap myself in love, nothing can touch me. I am unavailable for disaster to strike. I’m flying. I’m more accessible than I’ve ever been yet I am unreachable by many things that once crushed me. I take nothing personally anymore, and happiness finds me everywhere I go.

Today life brought me unexpectedly face to face with another I dearly love. In the same place at the same time, I walked into a coffee shop and heard my name. I looked up and saw my brother. Neither of us had a clue what the other was doing, but the Universe saw it fitting to bring two happy people together. Events like this are life’s true gift. The present moment is a gift all on its own, but this was the icing on the cake.

Material Objects as Life Purpose Replacements

Symptoms of detachment from spirit can feel like anxiety, fear, sadness, discontent, failure, and discomfort, among others. This happens when we get sidetracked from our right and perfect path and take a detour through procrastination and other behaviours that don’t serve us.  The discontent will simply keep growing until you answer the call to get back on track and serve your life’s purpose.

If you feel a deep longing to do something fulfilling with your life but let your fears talk you out of taking action, you can get stuck for a very long time between the fear of moving forward and the fear of staying the same.  Your discomfort is caused by not keeping up with your soul’s lessons.

As you learn in this lifetime, you are constantly outgrowing your old circumstances and gearing up to change, to grow, to learn, and to master each new level you encounter.  Your guides and angels leave little clues and synchronistic events along the way to make life fun and exciting, and even extremely hard if you must learn a difficult lesson.  It is all for your greatest good.

Though you may not consciously know what you are longing for, taking courageous action toward what feels good each and every day can illuminate the path ahead.  One day, when you look back to where your journey began, you will do so in awe of the cascade of fortunate encounters and events that guided you right to where you wanted to be!

If you know what you desire, yet aren’t taking action, the discomfort will only grow until you listen to your authentic self and start making changes in your life.  No matter how hard some decisions may initially seem, the pain you will endure from not taking action will eventually become so extreme that you have to change.

File 2015-05-15, 11 20 49 AMThe Universe will support you always. 

We all have a little voice in our head that cheers us on.  This inner voice tells us when something needs to change and when we need to take action. It always has our best interest at heart. We also have a little voice that tells us we are not good enough – this is the voice of fear and anxiety, and the more attention you give it, the stronger it will get.  Take your power back from this voice and take action in the direction of your bliss. You are and always have been worthy.

There is a lot of fear entwined with change, but there doesn’t have to be. Fear and anxiety can’t survive the light.  They will disappear the second you acknowledge your worthiness and take action toward your dreams. Use them to guide you out of your comfort zone – you really have nothing to lose but your discomfort, and you have a lifetime of happiness to gain!

It all comes down to this:

You can either listen to the unrest and question it, asking yourself what kind of life you must live in order to feed your spirit and live with passion, or you can continue to live in denial and room with anxiety, fear, and discontent.  If you choose the latter, you will certainly feel the pain of disconnection and try to remedy the pain by acquiring material objects.

Material Objects as Life Purpose Replacements

  • Do you have a lot of stuff?
  • Do you have a need to shop?
  • Do you feel fulfilled in your life?
  • Are you constantly fearful and anxious?
  • How are your relationships?
  • Do you think about why you are buying something before you complete the purchase?
  • Do you need to buy something to be happy?
  • Are you feeling inspired or blocked in your life?
  • Do you have a lot of energy or is your body tired and stagnant?
  • What do your closets look like?
  • Is your house clean?

Are you numbing yourself by acquiring material objects?  Do you try to cover up your pain, fear, and anxiety by purchasing items to gain happiness?  Until you listen to your spirit and pursue your life’s purpose, the high you get from buying things will come and go hundreds of times until you wake up to the truth that nothing outside of you can make you happy. Happiness has been and will always be an inside job. Listen to your spirit.

Not only will objects not make you happy in the long run, but the more stuff you have, the more energy if takes from you. The more electronics you have, the more responsibility you have in making sure they run properly. The more cars you have, the more insurance you must buy and the more upkeep you must perform or delegate.

The more pets you have, the more you must feed them, walk them, and seek veterinary care. The more clothing you have, the more clothing you must wash/dry/fold/dry clean/repair. The more stuff you have laying around your house, the more stuff you have to dust, and the harder it is to find anything anywhere!

Material accumulation is a symptom of spiritual disconnection – a symptom of not fulfilling your life’s purpose.

When I am feeling stuck and anxious, it is almost always because I have been hanging out with my fears and not pursuing my life’s purpose. The only thing that truly makes me feel better is listening to my inner guidance and taking action on it. For instance, I may be procrastinating by cleaning the house instead of writing. This little voice in my head tells me that I need to write. About a minute after I sit down at my computer and begin to type, all fear and anxiety disappear and I feel completely connected to my spirit and my life’s purpose once again. I know I am following my life’s purpose because it makes me happy.

Maybe you have a habit of numbing out in front of the television, and while you needed to relax the first night, the second night your spirit may pipe up and start making you feel uneasy. Our spirit selves remind us that we didn’t go through the trouble of being born on Earth to sit on a couch night after night after night. If you watch television every night would put money on the table that you feel you were meant for something more, because you are.

There is nothing wrong with watching television sometimes!  I know there is nothing better for my spirit some nights than to snuggle up with my husband and watch a good movie, but some nights my spirit would rather read a book, play with watercolours, spend quality time with my significant other or kids, make love, go for a walk, post an inspirational quote on instagram, or sit in the back yard and eat a popsicle!

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When you are feeling fearful or anxious it is important that you question the unrest.  Ask yourself what your spirit needs to thrive, and listen to the guidance, feelings, and images that come to mind.  Spend some time in meditation and quietly reflect.

The next time you want to buy something, ask yourself why. This simple question can make you dig deep and figure out what you are really trying to achieve by acquiring something else.

We recently cleaned out our entire house, from the depths of the closets to the cupboards, drawers, and crawlspaces.  We simply asked ourself this one question about everything: Does this give me energy or deplete it?  If something didn’t feel good to, it got thrown in the donation pile and left the house a few hours later.  Make sure your donation pile doesn’t stick around for months.  Take it away immediately and feel the energy in your house soar!

Getting rid of the old creates space for the new without your energy getting lost. There is flow. Life. Beauty. Peace. It opens the door to possibilities you’ve never even considered.  Take your power back from the material objects in your life and start visualizing a life of purpose and happiness.  How can you serve? How can you bring joy to yourself and others? What do you love to do so much that you would do for free?

Feel the anxiety and fear melt away into excitement as soon as you commit to taking action in the direction of your dreams!

33 Life Lessons in 33 Years

Life lessons.  We learn them through love, through fear, and everything in between. Pain has always been my biggest teacher, and I’m sure you can relate. Sometimes we learn our lessons immediately. Sometimes we think we’ve learned the lesson only to keep replaying the same old negative patterns over and over. And sometimes they literally have to slap us in the face, knock us down, and step all over us before we really get it.

The lessons we learn in those incredibly bare emotional times are the ones that we will never forget. But fortunately, we can also learn lessons through those who have been down those bumpy dirt roads for us.  In honour of my 33rd birthday this week, it is my hope that my life lessons can shine some light on your burdens and allow some grace to enter your life without you having to learn them the hard way.

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1.  Open your heart.

It is safe for you to open your heart to give and receive love.  The more you love the more love can return to you. Release any fears you have around giving and receiving love.

  1. You are responsible for your own happiness.

Choose to find the joy in every moment. Even in the chaos. Especially in the chaos. Any time you find yourself unhappy just let it go and do whatever you must in order to return to happiness. Do you want to be happy? Happiness is the only choice for an outstanding life.

When we take action and think thoughts that bring us pleasure, we are in alignment with our inner being. High vibrational beings attract other high vibrational beings; Happy people want to be around happy people!

  1. Release all judgments.

We are all on a journey. We are in no position to judge another because we have not walked in their shoes. They have their own reality that is separate from ours. So let judgments leave as quickly as they enter your mind and replace any unloving thoughts with loving-kindness. Send them love and light and wish them well on their travels.

  1. Set clear goals.

Life is what you make it. Decide what you want to get out of life. Choose your destination and take guided action to bring it into tangible reality. With each moment of decision, you have the power to shape your destiny. Set goals. Review them daily. Check in regularly to make sure your actions are producing the desired results and change your actions as required.

  1. Start a savings account.

Start a savings account and put money in every time you receive a paycheque. This is something we have started with our children from the day they were born and they’ve already amassed small fortunes. It is so exciting to be able to empower our children and teach them to respect money. And it’s never too late to start. If you don’t have a savings account, start one today!

6. Forgive.

Let go of past wounds. Let go of all things you cannot control and know that everything always works out in the best interest of everyone involved. Life is too short to hold a grudge. Resentment is like consuming poison and expecting the other person to die. Choose happiness. Choose forgiveness. Choose love.

Forgiveness does not condone others’ behaviour, but it does return your power to you. In forgiveness, you let others off the hook for your happiness. Forgive, let go, and move on.

  1. Expect miracles.

Wake up every day and proclaim, “Something amazing is going to happen today!” Expect surprises. When you expect life to be really good, life will show you the really good stuff. If you expect life to be hard, it will be.

  1. The tough times = exponential growth.

We are always in a constant state of change. Even if you are at rock bottom today, a year from now this tough time will be long behind you and you will more clearly see the lessons. Time heals. Draw upon your energy and strength and follow your inner guidance which is always steering you toward joyful expansion. You are never alone. You are always being guided and protected. This too shall pass.

9. Practice Gratitude.

The easiest way to get yourself out of a rut is to return to love and gratitude. Find appreciation in every moment and you will bring yourself into alignment with your inner being. Practice gratitude and your life will flow beautifully before your eyes.

10.  The Universe returns the vibration you emit.

The law of attraction is real. The Universe rewards high vibrations with high vibrational gifts and low vibrations with low vibrational gifts. If you are kind, you will receive kindness. If you are fearful you will encounter more and more fear. Be aware of the vibration you are emitting in each moment and bring yourself back into alignment as soon as you become aware of your misalignment!

11. Baby steps equal massive action.

If you take small courageous actions every day toward the realization of your dreams, you will be successful in achieving them.  Small courageous action = massive change!

12. Get rid of negativity.

Get rid of anything and anyone in your life that brings you down. This includes all letters, pictures, paintings, clothing and items that give you a bad vibe. Turn off the radio when songs don’t make you feel as good as you want to feel.

You will mimic the vibe of your tribe, so make sure the people you hang around most often are lifting you up. You want to surround yourself with people who help you learn and grow. If you’re the smartest person in the room, you’re in the wrong room.

13. Move your body daily.

Cash in on all the health benefits of exercise and increase your heart rate every single day. Not only will you burn calories and build muscle, but you will release endorphins that will raise your mood naturally. Exercise literally makes you happy, not to mention healthy!

14. Don’t be too serious.

People who laugh more are less stressed. Laughter boosts the immune system and releases endorphins just like exercise. When you are happy you raise your vibration. When you are high vibrational, you attract good feeling experiences into your life!

15. Pray.

Your angels and guides are available to help you in each and every moment, but you have been given the gift of free will so you must ask them for help. Ask them for the strength and power to forgive. Ask them for courage and clarity in troubling times.

Ask them to come to you in your dreams and help you work on a specific problem. Ask them to open your heart and help you to love freely. Ask them to help you see things differently. Ask them for guidance on anything and everything. Instead of complaining about anything, ask that the solution be shown to you. Ask for guidance and look for the answers all around you.

16. Find a role model.

Search out the best people in your field and learn from them. Find people who are already doing what you want to do, and doing it well. They can save you from making a lot of mistakes, and wasting a lot of time.

17. Don’t take anything personally.

Don’t let the things that people do or say bother you. Their opinion may be their reality but it has no business becoming yours, especially if their opinions make you feel badly about yourself! Your true self is pure love and anything other than pure love does not really exist.

18. Use your power wisely.

You can focus your attention on anything. What you repeatedly focus your attention on is what you are going to amass skill in. Invest your time and energy wisely.

For instance, what do you see when you look at your partner? Do you see all of the things that bother you or do you see all of the reasons why you love them? See only love. Be loving. Do these two things and your relationships – and your life – will transform.

19. You are not your thoughts.

That continuous chatter that occurs between your ears all day long is not who you really are. You are the watcher of the thoughts, but the thoughts are not you. Let thoughts move freely through your brain and be careful not to attach yourself to them. Notice the thoughts and release them. Your inner being cannot be disturbed so long as you are mindful of this. Do not take even your own thoughts personally.

20. Stop all self betrayal.

Listen to your emotional guidance/intuition/vibes/gut feelings and be true to yourself; be true to your emotions. Emotions provide deep insight into the soul. When something feels bad, it probably is. If you become aware that you feel poorly, find a better feeling thought or take a better feeling action.

Express your emotions. Unexpressed emotions are ticking time bombs, so communicate your emotions to your tribe as they arise and let them move through you. Work through and release pain as it arises. If you are holding on to anything, there is no better time than the present to let it go and give yourself permission to heal.

21. Procrastination is a silent killer.

Perfection and procrastination team up to kill your dreams. If you have a dream, don’t wait until conditions are perfect before you begin making it a reality. Perfection doesn’t exist, so you’ll be procrastinating forever! Whatever it is, do it now!

22. Failure is impossible.

You can stumble, pause, and retreat for years on your dreams even, and as long as you get back up and move forward you will never fail. Learn from your mistakes. Use the lessons to build yourself up and make yourself stronger. Every impediment means that you are closer to your goal. Never give up.

23. Be present.

It is never the past. It is never the future. It is only ever the present, and it’s the most beautiful gift you will ever receive. The present moment is where we experience pure love and joy. Don’t get caught up reliving past traumas or spend your present moment worrying about the future. If you can’t control something, like the past for instance, let it go.

Use your senses and enjoy the present moment. Be still and enjoy spending time with yourself. Enjoy time with others. The most important person in your life is the one that is right in front of you in the present moment.  Give your all to them.

24. Fear is an illusion.

We are the creators of our reality. We are the creators of our fears. Our fears exist only in our mind and they are not real. A fear of public speaking, a fear of spiders, a fear of not being loved, etc., they are all illusions. As soon as you make the decision to change your beliefs around your fears, the illusion is unmasked.

Shine a light on your fears. Fear thrives in the darkness, but the moment you shine a light on it, it can no longer survive. Decide that you are an amazing public speaker. Spiders are a beautiful piece of nature. Know that you are infinitely loved and supported by the Universe. Take your power back and start believing in the magnificent being that you are and destroy those illusions!

25.  Only love is real.

If fear is the darkness, love is the light. You can feel ecstatic love whenever you wish. Tap into the immense field of love that is all around. God is love. You are love.

See through the eyes of the Divine, the lens of love, and your life will change forever. Continuously let go of any disserving thoughts and return to love. Look past the egos of others and see the love within them. See love and the darkness will diminish. The more often you choose love over fear the easier it will get and the happier you will be.

Take time to meditate every day. An ideal time is 20 minutes for beginners. This will give you enough time to really relax and just be. This is where you can truly connect to divine love and grace and be one with your inner being. There are many benefits of meditation such as an increase in focus, optimism, immunity and awareness, and a decrease in depression, worry, stress, anxiety, and fear. It is basically the happy pill everyone is looking for, so if you don’t meditate now I encourage you to give it a try!

26. Be authentic.

Be yourself. Speak your truth and shine your light. If you show up authentically in your life, you give others the permission to show up authentically as well. Let your true self shine and give any worries about doing so to your angels. You are loved and supported by the Universe at all times. The more often you act from your authentic core, the more space you open up for magical opportunities to enter into your perception.

27. Be kind to yourself.

The people you spend the most time with have the opportunity to shape your thoughts and your beliefs. Since you have to hang out with yourself a whole lot, you had better watch what you say to yourself on a consistent basis. If you were another person, would you want to hang out with you? What would you want your best friend to say to you? Start being your best friend. Take care of yourself, love yourself, say nice things, and enjoy spending time alone.

You should be your biggest raving fan. If you don’t believe in yourself then no one else will. You have to love yourself first.

28. Eat mindfully.

You don’t have to eat a rigid diet, and you don’t need to label yourself. You can eat primarily paleo diet but have ice cream on occasion if you really enjoy it. Be authentic in all areas of your life. If you are binging on unhealthy foods, get to the root of the problem by shining a light on it. Love yourself enough to eat well.

29. Your thoughts create your reality.

The thoughts you think on a consistent basis shape your beliefs and form your actions. Be kind with your thoughts and suspend all judgment as it arises. All material objects came into being from a thought someone had. Each thought is a prayer that is immediately sent out into the Universe, so think wisely. This goes for people too. When you think poorly of someone, they can feel it whether you vocalize it or not. Think the best of people, and they will feel that as well!

30. Be generous.

The cycle of giving and receiving is one of ebb and flow. Give every day without expectation, and be open to receiving the blessings the Universe has to offer. If you enjoy giving but resist the presents that others try to bestow upon you, you are disrupting the cycle. Receive graciously so that others may enjoy giving. Give, accept, and repeat.

31. Live with passion.

Follow your bliss. If you consistently take actions that make you happy, you are living with passion. To live with passion is to greet each day with excitement. If you are not excited about life, then you need to start asking yourself when you really come alive. When are you most you? What lights you up? When do you have the most fun? Start doing more of it!

32. You’re growing or you’re dying.

Learn about something that interests you and share what you have learned with others. When we are learning, creating, and teaching, our spirits thrive.

33. We are all one.

Everything is connected. We are all energy and energy knows no boundaries. We have the power to change another’s mood by the vibe we’re putting out. We can telepathically connect with people on the other side of the world just by thinking about them. How many times have you thought about someone and then they coincidentally called you out of the blue? There are no coincidences.

We are all made of the same loving fabric.  When you love others you are loving yourself, and when you find fault in others you are finding fault in yourself.  Love unconditionally. The colour of our skin means nothing. Our socioeconomic backgrounds mean nothing. We are all in need of great love and support. Treat others as if they’re on your team, because they are.

Love First, Then Act

I’m not entirely sure how it came about, but I have within me a compassion for all beings that I have never felt before. I believe it’s been building in me ever since I made the conscious decision to take responsibility for my own happiness. These days my experience is more like a movie in some ways, especially when I see others suffering as I once did, caught in the reactive cycle of life and taking things way too seriously. Life can quite literally be all work and no play when you are engulfed in negativity. Even playing with my kids turned into me yelling constantly when I was acting from fear, disconnection, and unhappiness.

image1Of course, having been overweight during part of my life, I feel the pain of those who have a lot of literal weight to bare, and know that deep down they are struggling, even though they may show outward joy. On the inside, their spirits are starving to make a loving connection with their human selves, but they don’t know it.

When we withhold love from ourselves, we are completely disconnected from our inner being. Our inner beings have nothing but love for us, so when we act from a place of self destruction, self loathing, or self hatred, we are acting out in complete opposite of how our inner being sees us. This is why it feels so incredibly bad. We are out of alignment with Source energy and our true being, which has nothing but love for us.

Give love to yourself.

No matter where you are in your journey, love yourself first. Get centered by aligning with your inner being, and then, and only then, act. Center yourself through meditation, deep breathing, exercise, or doing something that makes you really happy.  Stop reacting to the world around you and travel within.  Check in with yourself often, and see what you feel about how your life is going.  What feels good?  What is draining your energy?  What does your spirit crave that you’ve been denying?

Unconditional love.

No matter what we have done or haven’t done, our higher selves love us unconditionally. This is true for all beings, even those that society labels as outcasts and criminals. If we were all connected to our inner being, there would be no crime to speak of. Individuals creating crimes are not acting from a place of interconnectedness or alignment. They are caught up in fear, and acting from a place of disconnection and misalignment.   If only they knew how loved and supported they are!

I had a daydream today about what would happen if all of humankind came into their power at the same moment in time.  I am thankful that I know I am the creator of my reality and it is because of this knowledge that I act out of love for others and love for myself.  I am planting the seeds that create more love in my existence. It is my wish that everyone know this deeply one day.

See only love.

If you are ready to take responsibility for your happiness then I encourage you to try to find a piece of yourself in everyone you cross paths with each and every day. Withhold judgment and know that everyone is doing the best they can with the knowledge that they have. Be the light in the room instead of adding to the darkness. Show compassion. Smile. Say please and thank you. Hold a door longer that you would like, and find the similarities between you and another. We are quick to make judgments of people without even talking to them. Get to know someone, if even for a few minutes. You never know what a little love and attention can do for someone.

If judgments and criticism arise from your ego, just be aware of the thoughts and let them pass by. Choose a better feeling thought and move on with your day. If you feel the need to vocalize your judgment to a friend who may be nearby, notice this too. Stay silent, and notice your ego’s response. When you practice this enough, the ego will soften and you will no longer feel the need to vocalize judgment because the judgments will no longer arise in you in the first place! Eventually you will have only love for others. And you will have compassion for their trials and tribulations.

Love yourself first.  Spread the love, and you will change lives.

Love Yourself First

Eleven months ago I was snapped out of the deep fog that I was in and awoke to this great need to be more, well, me. I realized that part of me was slowly dying and I needed help ASAP. I turned to the Divine, opened up communication with my angels, and never looked back.

The time had come to stop making excuses.

We have 3 young boys: presently 3, 2, and 9 months, and they were my evergreen excuse for everything and anything. “I’m tired. I’ll live my life when they grow up” sums it up. What I didn’t realize was that putting my life on hold was pretty much killing me. I had fallen out of love and I was suffering.

You simply cannot give love to others if you don’t love yourself first. That was the lesson I was learning. I send so much love and respect to stay at home moms. It is the hardest job anyone will ever have. For years I tried to love it but it just wasn’t me. I was so unhappy sacrificing my spirit that I had nothing left to give. I had it so backward. I needed to show myself some honest love. I needed to admit that I didn’t enjoy being a stay at home mother.

I thought that I had to give all of my love and all of my time to my kids – that’s why I had kids in the first place, right? I thought that I was a failure if I wanted anything other than to spend all of my time with them. But if you are not doing something that you absolutely love, if you are not giving love to yourself first, then you are withholding the only thing that is real from your spirit. I wasn’t doing anything to feed my spirit and I was suffocating. Between drowning in the fear of failure as a stay at home mother and the lack of oxygen my spirit was receiving, I was barely functioning. Throw my negative mindset into the heap and you have one very unhappy individual.

Once I let go of the belief that I had to be a servant to my children 24/7 and started to ask myself what I really wanted out of life, things started happening. Once you start to follow your bliss and start feeding your spirit, life gets magical. If there are excuses that you’re used to making, it’s time to call yourself out on it. Notice the patterns, the choices, the addictions, and start questioning the status quo. Are you growing, or are you wilting?

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Most of the time, we hold ourselves back. We hold limiting beliefs that keep us right where we are. We build the boxes that we’re stuck in, and we build them ourselves. It’s not because we’re scared of not making it, but that we’re scared of what will happen in our lives if we DO make it.

There are choices that we have to make in life that we simply cannot come back from. Once our eyes are open, we can never close them. When we’ve tasted Divine love and grace, we want to share it with the world. Negativity will feel like a magnet pushing you away. Your ability to tolerate negativity will be high, and anyone and everyone who exhibits a lower frequency will fall away. When you start to focus on love, fear falls away as well. New opportunities and people will notice your high vibration and they will be attracted to it.

When I opened my eyes to Divine love, the world ceased to exist as I knew it. I came to know so many truths that I hadn’t even thought about before. I came to know that we are all Divine beings; we are one. Only love is real. Fear is an illusion that we create in our minds. Most things that we are fearful of, we have made up! If you are warm, dry, fed, and not in the path of an oncoming car, your fears are probably in your head.

The fear that you’re not good enough and that you don’t have what it takes to be successful? It’s in your head. And that fear that you’re not worthy of great love? It’s also in your head. Tell the Universe, your angels, and God what you want from life. Expect great things. Have the courage to rise out of fear and act out of love. Love yourself first, and you will see magical things happen in all of your relationships. Do the inner work and your outer world will start to reflect your inner world of great love.

What are you scared of? What is holding you back? Are you making excuses? Are you being truthful with yourself? Are you being truthful with others? Is there something that you want to do in life that you’re not doing? Why? Do you love yourself?

For example, finding productive time is really hard with 3 young kids.  Lately I’ve been getting up at 5am so that I can have time to myself.  I write, I work, I meditate, or I go to the gym.  It’s my time to follow my inspiration and I love it.  I get more done in those 2 hours than I do in an entire day looking after an infant!  It’s magic time when you are fresh off a night of sleep.  Your mind is calm and rested and laser focus is the norm.

Know that you are worth great love. Take the time to meditate each day and ask yourself some questions, even if can find only 5 minutes a day. Meditation time is one of the greatest gifts that we can give ourselves. It’s time that we use to connect with our Higher Selves. Ask for guidance and see what comes up for you. The results really could change your life.

Book recommendation:  I highly recommend The Courage to Love Yourself by Janice Parviainen.  It amazes me that Janice lives in my small town!  I have met her and her energy is amazing.  Her book is amazing.  It’s definitely at the top of my must read list for personal growth and empowerment!

How to Love Yourself

How are you?  What’s new?

How would you answer these questions?  I used to answer them with responses like “fine, well, ok, not much, same old… etc.” but I’m aiming higher these days.  I refuse to let “good” get the best of me.  I’m in it for great.  Revolutionary.  I want to wake up every single day and have to pinch myself because surely I must be dreaming.  I want to stay up late and wake up early because I get to be me.

Life is in a constant state of change.  We’re always moving from A to B to C to wherever.  There are about a zillion ways to get from A to B but I want to get there in a flying car doing 150 at least.  I’m fully in it for the ride, wherever I go and whatever I do, I do it with joy.  I try to find acceptance in everything.  While cleaning up the kitchen for the 50 millionth time isn’t my favourite thing to do, I accept that it must be done, and I look for the joy.  It gives me an opportunity to check in with myself in a sort of moving meditation kind of way where I get to hang out with one of my favourite people: Me.

I wasn’t always this way.  There was a time when I was completely unsuccessful at loving myself.  I didn’t think I could do anything right and I disliked myself for not being smarter, thinner, and more outgoing.  I was withholding love from myself, and I was suffering for it.

I don’t know what happened in my childhood to make me think I didn’t deserve love.  Maybe I’ve been holding onto this indoctrination from a past life.  I’m actually certain of it.  Wherever I picked it up from, I am incredibly glad that I have come to know that I deserve an epic love story.  My Aha moment came during a soul shattering breakup in which I finally learned my lesson: Love yourself.  I kept ignoring the signs that told me to put myself first, but my angels were persistent with this lessen.  I couldn’t ignore them anymore.  My oxygen mask was finally on and my sole focus became making myself happy.

Your Ideal Best Friend: What Qualities do They Have?

What qualities do you look for in a best friend?  Write them down.  Here is my list: Supportive, communicative, authentic, honest, keeps in touch, inspiring, passionate, appreciative, funny, easy to talk to, good listener, not too serious, kind, loving, generous, trustworthy, adventurous, driven, joyful, understanding.  Now, look at your list and ask yourself if you’re being a good friend to your friends.  Now ask if you’re being a good friend to YOURSELF.  What areas do you need to put a little more work into?  What areas are you doing a good job in?  Journal about your successes and what you can do to improve in certain areas.  I certainly had a lot to write about after I did this exercise.

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Words of Affirmation to Love Yourself

Look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself: “You are worthy of great love.  You are loving.  You are loved.  Thank you, body, for being an amazing place to live.  I give you nourishing food and plenty of water so that you may keep me healthy and energetic.  I love you.”  Feel free to change this and add some personal touches.  Make it perfectly and authentically yours, and make it full of love.

Support yourself every single day.  Every time you see yourself in the mirror, give yourself love.  If you ever start getting negative toward yourself, remind yourself that you have always done the best you could do.  But now your best is better, so you can do better!

Live, Die, Repeat

I had a moment of epiphany that struck me last night while watching “Live, Die, Repeat.”  It was such an unexpected, magical healing moment and I instantly knew that all of my relationships would improve because of it.  I realized that we have this same gift of waking up every single day with awareness.  We can wake up knowing that our actions impact the world, and we can use this awareness to show up in our lives wholeheartedly and be present in each moment.

How can we impact the world, you ask? The secret is love, and the secret to love is in opening our hearts.  In each moment we have the ability to open our hearts and act out of love.  It’s a choice.  We choose our path in every single moment. Every situation can be handled with grace or with difficulty, and we can choose to ease into love or we can choose to resist loving and resist being loved. We can hate, judge, break each other down, but we’re doing it to ourselves as well.  When we choose love we have the power to heal not only ourselves, but everyone we interact with. How amazing would this world be everyone acted out of love? If we treated each other as the best of friends rather than “the other”, sharing kindness and a positive outlook?

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We are all energy and we are all connected; your vibration, high or low, interacts with the vibrations around you.  A person feeling and acting from love and happiness will vibrate at a high frequency, whereas someone feeling and acting from jealousy, resentment, or judgement will vibrate at a lower frequency.  Since our energies interact, we can pull people up or bring them down.  I’m sure you can bring someone to mind who is usually negative, a downer, and someone you don’t want to spend a lot of time around.  You can understand why it’s wise to choose friends that carry high vibrational energy.

In each moment we are either healing humanity with our outpouring of love or destroying it with a lack of love. We can choose to open our hearts or close them. When we choose to open our hearts we are promoting love, happiness, and joy. We are telling the universe “more of this, please.” When we close our hearts we are giving in to fear and cutting off the love energy that our world truly needs to heal itself. When we close our hearts, we hurt.

Open up. Choose love. Let go of fear.

Each day when you awake, take a moment to be grateful for all that has been given to you: your life, your breathe, your body, friends, family, lovers, etc. Even take a moment of gratitude for the hurdles that have catapulted your growth. Be grateful for the things that didn’t work out as planned, for those failures likely created the possibility for something even better than you imagined. If you happen to find yourself in a moment of darkness and change, find comfort in knowing that the light is just around the corner. Open your heart to send and to receive. Smile. Be happy.

If you start your day in this way you are choosing love. You are opening your heart to receive all of the good the universe has in store for you.

Affirmation: “I open my heart to love and to receive all of the good the universe has for me now. I release all fears to the Universe and take great comfort in knowing that I am loved. I am loving. It feels so good to know that I am worthy of giving and receiving great love.”

 

Take Massive Action

I overheard some ladies the other day talking about the law of attraction.  Afterward, I kept thinking about “The Secret” movie and how they basically forgot to mention that taking massive action is probably the most important part of manifestation.  You can sit and meditate and ask your angels for help all you want, but if you don’t put their guidance into action, you’re not going to make it very far.

Once you have clear goals mapped out in your mind, it’s time to take little steps toward their fulfillment every day.  Notice the synchronicities that are trying to help you along the way, and act on any opportunities that arise.  If it’s a business you want to start, you can start laying the groundwork while at your present job.  Maybe all you need are 30 minutes each evening to make it happen.  Maybe you need more time, or maybe you don’t need any time at all – once you have a clear goal and the timing is right, your angels can move mountains and you can find yourself on the fast track.  This can happen in any area of your life – you just have to be ready to work and know exactly what you want to make happen.

If it’s a fitness goal that you wish to reach, you can break down your action steps into daily activities that will get your body moving.  If it’s important enough, you’ll find the time.  I’m not saying it’s going to be easy, but it’s going to be worth it.

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You know those little gut feelings that you have?  Start following them.  Set your intentions for your life and then follow the guidance that is offered.  Align yourself with your Higher Self by following those hunches that want you to act integrally.  I always get an uneasy feeling if I’m about to eat something that isn’t in line with my health and fitness goals.  I’m getting better at listening to those feelings, but it’s definitely not easy!  We have habits that are comfortable for us, but if they haven’t gotten us to where we want to go in the past, they’re worth the discomfort that arises when we choose differently.  That discomfort starts to feel really really good once you start blazing that new trail.

If you’ve got a fitness goal you want to reach, I highly recommend a heart rate monitor – especially if you’re competitive like me.  It helps me challenge myself every time I wear it.  I’m always the last person on the ice at shinny these days because I’ve always got a challenge for myself.  Today I had to burn 800 calories before I could get off the ice.  I’m hardcore, I know.  At the end of 80 minutes, I had burned exactly 800 calories.  The point is that I have a fitness goal for myself and I intend to reach it.  It doesn’t matter when exactly, but I make sure to take action steps each day that take me toward my goal!

Next time you get a gut feeling that something is off, take a moment and listen to your body.  Start asking yourself questions and listen to what comes up.  I guarantee you that you’ll start to notice things that you previously maneuvered while on autopilot.

 

 

The Power of Intention

There is something extremely powerful about intention.  It’s a goal that is present in the now.  The problem with most goals is that they are feats that will occur “someday,” but someday never happens.  Don’t wait for someday.  Do it now.  What I like about setting intentions is that they laser focus your attention so that there can be only one outcome.  The intentions I have on the front-burner right now include creating a fitter body than ever before, and the intention to be happy.  There is no other option in my mind.  I know I will get to my goal physique and I will be happy – most of the time anyway.

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Once you set your mind on something it is as good as done.  Simply making the decision to do (or not do) something is a game winner.  Once you make a clear decision, the universe has your back.  Your angels will go to work behind the scenes, setting up synchronistic events that help to ensure the outcome you desire, so long as it is in the best interest of anyone else involved.  Of course you still have to do the work, but setting the intention to get something done sets you up for success.

For instance, I love to run, test my boundaries in a hot yoga class, and push myself with a 24kg kettlebell.  I have always loved to work out, but since setting the intention to get the body of my dreams, getting a workout in every day has been incredibly easy.  There is always someone who is willing to help me out so that I can get to the gym or that yoga class.  I even dropped my 2 month old off at the local coffee shop where the owners looked after him for 2 hours so I could play hockey!  Life is full of synchronistic events that want you to succeed.  All you have to do is ask for help, and recognize that help when it comes along.

We all have guardian angels who want to help us, but since we have free will, we have to ask for their help.  They won’t interfere in our lives without our permission.  I ask my angels on a daily basis to help me, and I tell you it works.  My inner dialogue in the morning sounds something like this:

“Angels, I ask that you help me to release the pounds that no longer serve me.  I love my body.  It is an amazing place to live and I am so grateful to have it.  I am excited about what I have accomplished this far and I am so excited to see my progress every day.  Thank you for helping me to make healthy decisions so that I can have the body of my dreams.”

Our angels communicate with us through our intuition, little gut feelings that make us aware of this and that.  They even communicate to us through the intuition of others.  It’s why we may look at the clock every day at the exact same time, and why we tend to hear or see the same tidbit of information over and over.  It’s said that if something catches your attention 3 times, your angels are screaming to send you a message!

I feel the support of the universe constantly when I am running.  I get gut feelings that cheer me on.  When I run past people on the sidewalk, they often smile at me, or even better, they say things like “great job!”  I wish they knew just how much that encouragement means to me, but on some level I think they do.  Often, I get these rushes of encouragement exactly when I need to hear them.  It makes me think that it’s all in divine timing; my angels are pulling strings to ensure I succeed.

Since I ask my angels daily for help with my fitness intentions, my intuition is pretty bang on for steering me toward healthy foods and away from complete dietary disaster.  I can have one piece of chocolate and not want to eat the entire bar.  I can have a monster burger for lunch and have a salad for dinner.  I’ve always known that my body craves movement every single day, but I made excuses before and I was unhappy for it.  Now I listen to my intuition about fitness and my spirit is happy.  I’m in a place of balance for once in my life and it feels pretty amazing.

In fact, I set the intention to write this blog post tonight while I was at the gym earlier today.  I decided that I wouldn’t let how tired I might be (my usual excuse) get in the way.  And so it is!